Category - News

Student Fined For Driving Doorless Car

Sam Wilson, 25, is a new front runner in the 2014 Darwin Awards. Wilson, from Bingham in Nottinghamshire, was driving his car to a scrap yard, expecting to get £150 for it. However, he had the bright idea of taking parts off it with the intention of selling them separately.Doorless car driven by Sam Wilson of Bingham, Notts

He had removed all the doors, the bonnet, and – judging by the photos – most of the lights, including the indicators. The article doesn’t say anything about the brake lights, but since they are part of the rear cluster, and since the article definitely states that there were no indicators… well, you have to hazard a guess. In fact, look closely and you can see that the rear cluster is gone.

An article in the Telegraph confirms that Wilson really was that stupid, and didn’t have any brake lights either.

Championing his Darwin Awards nomination, Wilson said after he attended court:

The car didn’t have any lights on it, but my argument was that it was daylight.

It didn’t have any signals either, but I used arm signals to indicate…

…Wilson added he thought the car was safe to drive because it still had an MOT certificate…

In the Telegraph version he also claimed:

…there were kit cars on the road that also lacked features such as   doors and lights.

You need to get your eyes tested, Sammyboy. You won’t see many cars without brake lights on the roads. Except for ones like yours. The police didn’t share his wisdom. They said:

It wouldn’t have taken much to realise that the skeleton of a vehicle Wilson was trying to drive on the carriageway was not roadworthy.

It beggars belief that he thought he could drive it without anyone having concerns.

It isn’t clear how or why Wilson thought the scrap dealer would pay the full £150 after he had taken the very parts off it that those who go to scrap yards are looking for which justifies that scrap value in the first place. He was eventually paid £70 for it which meant – after his £250 fine and shiny new three-points on his licence – he made a loss of £180 on the deal. Mind you, as a student I’m sure he got some great selfies and will have a great tale to tell in the Student Bar for a while.

It never ceases to amaze me that people think an MoT certificate somehow covers them no matter what condition their car is in at the time it is examined while out on the road. If a bulb breaks as you are driving away from your MoT then the car instantly becomes “unroadworthy”, and you are liable.

How To Stop Texting When You’re Driving

You read a lot of crap on the internet news feeds. Every now an then, something comes along that takes the biscuit – on the surface, at least.Green Thumb Nail

A car dealership is encouraging drivers to paint their thumbnails green to remind them not to text while driving. They got the idea from an American who “invented the technique”. To be fair to the dealership, though, the idea is to get to people to do it and then post photos on to a Facebook page. The dealership will donate £100 to various charities for the first few people who do.

To be brutally honest, the only beneficiaries will be those charities. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it is hardly going to change the way people behave.

The kinds of people who text while driving are simply too stupid to have a driver’s licence in the first place. They text because they want to, and they know they shouldn’t be doing it. If I see someone fiddling with their phone at traffic lights when I’m on a lesson I eyeball them – and when they see me, their immediate reaction is an absolute guarantee that they KNOW they are doing wrong.

The world has become a very strange place compared to what it was when I was a kid. Nowadays, people are actually dumb enough to believe stunts like this have intrinsic value.

Cyclists And Other Monkeys

A reader sent me this link to an article in the Daily Mash. Titled “Roads are not a velodrome”, it pokes fun at that spiralling number of wannabe athletes who behave like apes on our roads as they take their fragile, expensive, two-wheeled toys that they can’t handle – either physically or mentally – out on to routes which are already dangerous.Cyclist in middle of road

Last week, on the Virgin roundabout in Colwick, for example, two of these twats were riding side-by-side and deliberately straight-lined it – still side-by-side. The retard who gave me the evil-eye is hopefully on some sort of court order to prevent him having children for the sake of society. He really shouldn’t be allowed to breed, but unfortunately people like him can usually do it asexually – and I’ll bet asexual sex is something he IS good at. Because cycling certainly doesn’t make the list.

DSA Is Now Officially DVSA

It was announced last summer that the DSA would merge with VOSA to create a single body. As of Wednesday, 2 April 2014, this change took effect and the combined body is now known as the Driver and Vehicle Standards Agency (DVSA).

There’s no information yet about when – and if – there will be a specific logo for the new body. The number of hits I’ve been getting on the blog asking suggests that this is important to a lot of ADIs for reasons which are unclear. Far more important is the financial impact – good, bad, or remaining the same – on those who use it.

For anyone who needs to contact what used to be VOSA or DSA, just use the same numbers and addresses you always did until new ones are announced. Outwardly, there is no real change at the moment.

The A537 Cat And Fiddle Road

I thought I was missing something when I saw this. Until the last few seconds of the clip, that is – when reality struck back. In summary, Jack Sanderson was nearly killed when his bike almost collided with a car on the notorious Cat & Fiddle Road in Cheshire. Instead, Sanderson rolled down a hill and escaped injury.

The A537 is one of the most dangerous roads in Europe. It also attracts some of the stupidest specimens on the planet – and it is because of those that the road has had reduced speed limits imposed, has double white lines indicating that no overtaking is allowed, and has speed cameras fitted. So, when you look at the video recorded by Sanderson you immediately notice how many rules he was breaking.

To start with, it doesn’t look like he was driving at 50mph (the speed limit which is imposed on that road, I believe). Secondly, he clearly crosses a solid white line – on a bend, with a sign warning of a series of bends, and SLOW marked on the road – to overtake another biker. It is after that when he apparently loses control, veers across the solid white line again on another bend, and almost smashes into a car coming the other way (and note that the two are approaching each other at an combined speed of over 100mph).

He avoids certain death for himself by flinging his bike off the road and down a hill. The text snippet for the report simply says:

A motorcyclist has had a lucky escape on one of Europe’s most notoriously dangerous roads and published the video as a warning to others.

Jack Sanderson from Cheshire crashed on the A537 Cat and Fiddle road, in Cheshire, after his motorbike crossed the white line and he swerved to avoid an oncoming car.

What it should say is that Sanderson was a dickhead who was speeding, overtaking illegally, and behaving in a dangerously immature way because of his almost non-existent riding skills, and who very nearly caused the death of an innocent motorist because of this illegal and incompetent behaviour.

The last words are that Cheshire Police are investigating. Let’s hope they don’t bottle it and let the moron off. He should be banned from riding or driving for a very long time.

Edit: the Police didn’t bottle it, but the courts did. Sanderson escaped jail.

Alcopal Slammed By ASA Again

I noticed a surge in hits from people searching for information about Alcopal or reviews of it. As I have said previously, Alcopal does not work. This is especially true when you consider that the guy who is peddling the stuff can’t even make up his mind how it is supposed to work in his marketing claims – he has variously said that it absorbs alcohol before you do, that it prevents it getting into the bloodstream “from the stomach”, and that it masks it on your breath. At the moment he appears to be back to claiming that it absorbs alcohol before you do – which would be scientifically impossible for such a small amount of material as is in the tablets, considering the volume of alcohol the type of arseholes likely to want to use it will have swallowed.Snake Oil Label with ridiculous claims

Anyway, when I got home today I noticed that the ASA has ruled against Alcopal’s latest set of inflated and unjustified claims. This is not the first time they’ve ruled against Alcopal, either.

This time around, our erstwhile Snake Oil peddler is claiming that…

New Alcopal tablets guarantee to improve impairments caused by consuming alcohol. Enjoy your night out without the fear of being spiked or ending up in a drunken stupor. Alcopal’s clever little ingredient prevents alcohol being absorbed through the stomach and into the bloodstream; it also gives some protection to the liver and kidneys.

I’m not sure why it is “new”. Maybe because the “old” one didn’t work, after all? But the real problem is that 80% of the alcohol you drink gets absorbed in the small intestine and not the stomach, so even if there was even a slight scientific justification for for claiming Alcopal acts as some sort of barrier in the stomach region, it falls flat on its face when intestinal absorption is brought in. And the comment about the liver and kidneys is a sly suggestion that alcohol-related liver disease can be prevented by Alcopal.

The ingredients in Alcopal do not stop alcohol getting into your bloodstream to any significant extent. The ingredients in Alcopal do not protect your liver and kidneys. The ingredients in Alcopal simply do not work. And the fact that Alcopal Ltd didn’t even bother to respond to the ASA’s questions shows clearly what kind of people you are dealing with.

Don’t waste your time even thinking about buying anything that makes these claims.

Drivers And Horses

This makes interesting reading. Well, it’s more mind-blowing than interesting, with almost 10% of drivers admitting that they don’t know how to behave when they encounter horses. Even more surprising is that the figure rises when you ask younger drivers (or Londoners) about the subject!Horse riders on the road

You’d expect that even a monkey would realise that when you are passing an animal weighing upwards of half a metric tonne, usually with a young girl on top of it, you’d slow down and give it wide berth. For people who haven’t yet acquired the mental capacity of monkeys the Highway Code clarifies the situation further:

214

Animals. When passing animals, drive slowly. Give them plenty of room and be ready to stop. Do not scare animals by sounding your horn, revving your engine or accelerating rapidly once you have passed them. Look out for animals being led, driven or ridden on the road and take extra care. Keep your speed down at bends and on narrow country roads. If a road is blocked by a herd of animals, stop and switch off your engine until they have left the road. Watch out for animals on unfenced roads.

215

Horse riders and horse-drawn vehicles. Be particularly careful of horse riders and horse-drawn vehicles especially when overtaking. Always pass wide and slowly. Horse riders are often children, so take extra care and remember riders may ride in double file when escorting a young or inexperienced horse or rider. Look out for horse riders’ and horse drivers’ signals and heed a request to slow down or stop. Take great care and treat all horses as a potential hazard.

The survey conducted by the AA is quite worrying, and raises a number of questions. Setting aside the obvious one about the intellects of people who are deemed competent to hold a driving licence and yet are clearly too stupid to work it out for themselves, what the hell are driving instructors doing when younger drivers – those who have recently passed their tests – don’t know what to do? The Highway Code is there for all to see, and at the very least the topic should be covered verbally if it can’t be dealt with using real situations.

Apparently, nearly 20% of those questioned believe horses shouldn’t be allowed on the roads. The simple fact is that greater than 99% of horse riders are courteous and don’t deliberately get in the way, and they get off the road as soon as they can. Contrast this with cyclists – of whom 99% are complete arseholes who get in the way on purpose, and who definitely shouldn’t be allowed on the roads – and you can see that everything is the wrong way round.

I do everything in my power to get my pupils to encounter horses at some stage on their lessons. I take them on single track roads near stables at the time of day when horses are being walked out so we can deal with them. As I’ve said before, girls on horses (the majority of riders) usually give a friendly wave of thanks. Male riders can be less friendly (I don’t know why that is), and racehorse riders (the minority of riders around my way, and usually failed jockeys) are miserable and arrogant little sods most of the time. Racehorses are useful training tools because they are usually restive and don’t like walking, so it gives us an opportunity to stop or even switch off the engine in some cases. In fact, on my way to a lesson tonight I had to slow right down for a horse being led along the roadside which was obviously a little edgy, eliciting a polite wave from the male handler.

It isn’t that difficult to find horses and horse riders in many places – even in urban areas – and many instructors really ought to be driving just a few miles extra in order to cover the subject properly instead of hanging round the test centres conserving fuel. Obviously, not everyone can experience horses and riders first hand on their lessons, and in those cases the instructor should absolutely and definitely be covering it verbally – which many clearly aren’t.

Two Plus One Cases Of TB Equals Media Frenzy

You’ve probably seen the news this week about two cases of TB being caught from cats. I suspect that the cleaners at the Daily Mail and The Sun’s headquarters had to clean a lot of urine-soaked carpets this week, as the entire workforce at both establishments probably pissed itself at this brand new opportunity to scaremonger over something.

In fact, The Sun has already started. It managed to dig up a story about dog infecting a human with TB. Since The Sun is no longer free online, I’ll include a link to an alternative version from the Daily Mirror. You will note the wording which allows a timeframe to be surmised:

A child has been diagnosed with tuberculosis after catching it from a family dog.

The pet has now been put down after giving the child the lung disease at a house in Gloucestershire.

The child, aged under ten, has now made a full recovery, according to the Sun.

This is scaremongering at its most pathetic, and the incident appears completely unconnected with the two cat cases. None of the various stories (this one is in the Mail) says when the dog-child case occurred, though normal TB treatment lasts typically between 6-12 months (in serious cases, for up to 2 years) and if the child in question is “fully recovered”, infection must have occurred at the end of last summer at the latest. However, it does establish the fact – if it wasn’t already widely known – that TB can be transmitted from badgers to dogs (and cattle), and then from dogs (and cattle) to the kind of people who are then most likely to put the dogs (or cattle) in their mouths. Oh, and vice versa, because there are historical documented cases of dogs apparently catching TB from humans. There is no reason to assume that it couldn’t miss out the cattle stage and go straight from badger-to-human, and since almost ANY mammal can carry TB it doesn’t take a giant leap of your imagination to see it being transmitted directly from pets. Vets were warning of it a year ago.Garfield Sneezing (large)

If we look at the recent cat incidents that have resulted in human infection, they are from a cluster of nine cases of feline TB identified last year in Berkshire and Hampshire. To get a full picture of what was going on you really do have to read the the right source – one which sees value in scooping a dramatic chat with the “victims” – because it’s only then that you realise that if someone is as soft as a sack of monkeys they would have the cat up to their face a lot of the time (I like cats, and it’s what I’D do if I still had one, and from what I remember if you forget to rub your face against your cat, the cat will come and rub itself against your face to remind you). The stories attempt to blame cleaning an open wound on one cat as the route of transmission, but I’m not prepared to dismiss the in-your-face route that easily. It’s pretty obvious that if a cat had TB there is no reason why it wouldn’t pass this on to a human who was rubbing it with their nose! The cat involved died from the illness. It was a rescue cat and was already unwell.

Regular TB in humans is caused by Mycobacterium tuberculosis (abbreviated M. tuberculosis). Mycobacterium bovis (or M. bovis) is the bacterium that causes TB in cattle, and which is carried by badgers and many other mammals – so many mammals, in fact, that the list includes humans. M. Bovis is the type of TB involved in these pet-human cases. According to Public Health England around 6% of TB deaths are attributable to M. bovis.

It is also worth noting that seven of the nine cats found to be positive for M. Bovis had bite and scratch wounds consistent with fighting with badgers, according to Carl Gorman – the vet who alerted authorities to the outbreak in Berkshire. He also said he believed that an outbreak in local herd of cattle was to blame. All nine cats lived within a three-mile radius, and six of them within 250 yards of each other. There’s nothing sinister involved, and it is certainly not “a mystery”, as suggested by one cat owner who had to have her cat put down. It is rare, but around 25 cats are nonetheless found to have contracted TB every year in Britain.

The two cat incidents are the first documented cases of cat-to-human transmission. There’s no reason to assume it hasn’t happened before, or that it won’t happen again. The apparently unrelated dog-to-human case proves that.

Both Public Health England and Animal Health and Veterinary Laboratories have assessed the risk to the public as VERY LOW. But I doubt that this will stop our gutter press from pretending otherwise. Remember that almost five years ago to the day we were all going to die of swine flu. A couple of years before that, avian flu was going to kill us all. They never give up, and I wonder how long it will be before some prat starts talking about culling cats.

Giant Rat In Sweden

One of the more popular stories on the blog is the one (well, several) about giant rats. I noticed another surge in hits, and this recent story on the BBC is probably why.Swedish Giant Rat

It would appear that a rat weighing around 1kg chewed through concrete and wood to gain entry into a Stockholm kitchen, whereupon it traumatised the human and feline inhabitants for several days until it was finally caught in a giant mousetrap.

As you can see from the photo, it was bloody huge – and unlike the British examples, it really does look like a proper rat. Mind you, yet again something which is such a scientific curiosity that it should be on display in a museum has been destroyed and cannot therefore be verified.

Note the nonsense at the end of the article. There is no scientific evidence that rats are getting bigger – and yet scientists “believe” that they could eventually grow to the size of sheep and weigh nearly 13 stones.

“New” Advice For Learner Drivers

Anyone who reads the blog regularly will probably be aware of my general disdain for groups like IAM and RoSPA when they start poking their noses into the affairs of driving instructors or offering “advice” about learning to drive (my personal opinion, of course). This is especially true of IAM, membership of which you’d be forgiven for thinking allows you to remain active in the Neighbourhood Watch even when you’re not at home! So when I saw this headline in my newsfeeds I wasn’t holding out much hope.

To be fair to RoSPA, though, they do make it clear that driving lessons are best taken with a qualified ADI (which will probably upset most IAM members). Their new website – which is the point of the news article in the first place – is actually quite sensible, and it certainly doesn’t overtly come across as seeking to undermine the ADI’s role (IAM take note). It focuses on what supervising drivers should be doing during private practice. You can view the site here.

Having said all that, I can’t help think that the goals of the site are somewhat unrealistic. On its home page it says:

This website will help you [the supervising driver] to:

During the learning period

  • Ensure the learner meets all the legal requirements for learning to drive
  • Ensure you meet all the legal requirements for supervising them during private practice
  • Allow the learner to get as much supervised practice as possible
  • Keep in touch with your young driver’s instructor and co-ordinate what happens in private practice with what happens in the professional lessons
  • Get the most benefit from practice drives

This creates problems right from the start. Unless the supervising driver is an ADI then he or she is unlikely to be able to fulfil all these requirements. Even IAM and RoSPA members will be lacking such information, since knowledge of it is not a prerequisite of membership of those organisations. The vast majority of parents and supervising drivers couldn’t possibly tie up all the loose ends. Elsewhere on the site RoSPA says:

[As supervising driver you should not] contradict the driving techniques taught by the instructor, even if you disagree with them. If you are concerned about something, make a note of it and discuss it with the instructor at a later date.

This contradicts the thrust of that first part. In fact, a large percentage of full licence holders DO disagree with what ADIs teach their kids or spouses, and often think that they know best. So in spite of the first quote, the clear implication is that RoSPA expects the supervising driver to NOT be fully competent in terms of the requirements list they have given. Furthermore, they say:

It is very important to maintain good communication with your learner’s instructor.

Aaaargh. Having parents or spouses interfering all the way through is NOT beneficial for the pupil (or the ADI). A quick hello/how’s-he-doing/goodbye is all you or the learner want most of the time, and longer discussions only become absolutely necessary if there is a problem AND if the person you’re talking to can actually influence the resolution. Some parents will happily interfere even when they’re not providing private practice. The worst ones for it are those who can’t cut the apron strings, which is often an underlying reason why little Jonny or Kylie isn’t progressing as fast as they could do in the first place. It is best if the learner is left to get on with their lessons without mum or dad poking their noses in all the time.

Personally, I like to show the parents what to look for – if they’re going to be supervising – by having them sit in on a lesson or two. I get uncomfortable if they want to come more often, like one I had a few months ago whose parents or big sister would invite themselves whenever they felt like it, even though they were not supervising him in any private practice, because they were desperate for him to take his test whether he could drive or not (and they didn’t like the fact I wouldn’t let him because he was dangerous). I know that they are not there for the reasons I’d expect them to be there for.

RoSPA’s site also advises:

If possible, show the learner’s instructor the ‘Driver’s Record’ or the telematics [‘black box’ insurance module if it is fitted] data frequently so they can see how the learner is doing in their practice drives.

This is yet more opportunity for parental demands for little Jonny or Kylie to go to test when the instructor doesn’t think they’re ready. The only people completing any sort of documentation should be the learner and the instructor. The last thing the ADI needs is mummy and daddy filling out driver records and putting ticks in all the boxes on the strength of a successful 5 minute driver every Saturday to Tesco. I’ve lost count of the times where mummy or daddy insists Jonny or Kylie “can drive”, and yet they bloody well can’t when they’re on their lessons. RoSPA needs to have a think about whether or not we should be teaching “safe driving for life”, because involving mummy and daddy in the decision over test readiness is hardly likely to result in Jonny or Kylie taking more lessons.

You can read the rest for yourself. Although some of it is good, RoSPA seems to be looking for solutions to problems which can never actually be solved, and by involving people who the unlikeliest to come up with a solution anyway. As a result, it is offering misleading and ambiguous advice.

Private practice is definitely useful for getting road time, which builds experience and confidence. It is usually not that useful for practising manoeuvres unless the private car is the same model as the instructors car, and it definitely isn’t useful for covering new material (guaranteed to create a bad habits). Most private practice involves driving the same routes to go to shopping or to see their grandparents.

As long as they are picked up on basic faults – and not even always then – learners are benefitting from private practice. It doesn’t need to be of the same intensity as a normal driving lesson.