Category - ADI

That’s All, Folks. For The Time Being.

An hourglassThis post was made shortly before the first lockdown at the start of the pandemic.

I’ve now officially cancelled all my pupils’ lessons (with the exception of a Pass Plus that concludes Tuesday, and I’m uneasy even about that. Update: I have cancelled it).

Not one of them had any issues whatsoever, and all of them fully understood the gravity of the situation we find ourselves in right now. I’ve told them they can phone me or text me at any time, because I’m always here (unless COVID-19 gets me first), and that I will contact them as soon as I know we’re OK to fire up again.

I fully understand the financial predicament many other instructors are in. But there comes a time when you have to realise which side of the seesaw has the heavier load. There’s no point trying to bounce down when there’s a two-tonne bag of sand the opposite end. And that’s where we are. This is serious shit beyond anything we have experienced before.

It strikes me that many instructors are only thinking of themselves – and (perhaps understandably) using their children as scapegoats. But COVID-19 is a problem that is so serious that people have got to start actively looking at alternative ways of dealing with not being able to pay the mortgage or the bills instead of trying to carry on working against the tide. Seriously, that’s going to be a lot easier than you imagine once you start dealing with it – and far easier than what is likely to happen if you don’t, keep working, and end up in hospital.

Remember (or understand) that COVID-19 isn’t just something you get, then get rid of. Evidence suggests that those who recover often have impaired lung function, and possibly impaired organ function. Basically, they’re disabled and susceptible to minor ailments later. Not everyone – it’s too soon to know for sure – but enough to ring the alarm bells. By trying to ‘feed your kids’ against odds, you could easily end up in a far worse position on that front once the problem passes.

I find it ironic that even though the government response stiffens by the day, the ‘I’m going to work no matter what’ brigade maintains a flat response.

It’s still a relatively free country, and people still have a relatively free choice (for now). But I’d like to think people would make the right choice before it is made for them.

Oh, and the title of this article just refers to my lessons. The blog’s going nowhere – especially seeing as I will have a lot of time on my hands.

Update 23/03/2020: I hear that both BSM and The AA have directed their instructors to stop lessons immediately. They will not be charging franchise fees for four weeks, and will review that later as needs be – and depending on what, if anything, the government comes up with.

Coronavirus And Driving Lessons

Virus imageHouston, we have a problem!

I only wrote this a couple of days ago, but I’m having to update it already. The problem I was referring to was that not many driving instructors understand statistics or come from scientific backgrounds. They are concerned about Coronavirus on the one hand, but trying hard to persuade themselves they’re not on the other because there are obvious financial implications if they cannot work.

I noticed that there is a Coronavirus infographic doing the rounds. It’s from China, and it reports that 80.9% of cases are mild, 13.8% are severe, and 4.7% are critical. It also points out that ‘the majority of people’ recover. The latter two percentages require hospitalisation and intensive care, respectively. The originator of this infographic on Facebook – not the original Chinese source, I believe – who goes under the Facebook name of Information Is Beautiful, concludes “the majority of… infections are mild”.

Let’s put this into a more real-world perspective. I’ll start with the bottom line: if the entire population of a care home were infected, the ‘mild’ and ‘severe’/‘critical’ number would flip, and the vast majority of those infected would be at great risk. The same would perhaps be true if, say, a special school with a high population of Down Syndrome pupils were infected, since those with Down’s frequently have breathing issues in the first place. In a hospital, where people may already be ill, it would likely wreak havoc.

Information may well be ‘Beautiful’, but Understanding Information In Context is a hundred times better. And since the original version of this article less than a week ago, the situation has changed dramatically – as anyone with any sense at all would have known would happen.

I have elderly parents, both of whom have COPD. If they were to catch Coronavirus, they would probably die. I have a pupil who has a baby son with Down’s. If he caught it, it would be a serious issue for him and his son. I have another pupil whose partner is pregnant (I quite possibly have several in that position without being aware). If they caught it, there would be an increased risk for them as a family.

People are still trying to liken COVID-19 to seasonal flu as a comparison. Coronavirus/COVID-19 is not flu, you idiots. Trust me, it isn’t. Flu can be prevented if you have an annual vaccination (and they picked the correct strains for it), whereas Coronavirus cannot. Coronavirus appears to be more easily transmitted than flu. But most significantly, the annual mortality rate from flu is about 0.1% of the population, whereas with Coronavirus it is anywhere between over 1% and 6.5% (the latter is the figure in Italy). In the UK, which arguably has the most precise count of infections than anywhere else, we currently have a death rate of about 4.5% based on the number of known infections (it was 1.8% when I first wrote this, and the number of deaths has gone from 10 to 177 in that time). It is far more deadly than flu – and there is no current protection.

As much as 70% of the population could be infected by Easter or during Spring – that would be around 40 million people. The death rate, assuming it stays relatively uniform, would mean that as many as 700,000 could die in the UK alone. And if the infection peaks again next year, this would put the current pandemic right up there with the Bubonic Plague in Mediaeval times when considered across Eurasia as a whole.

This. Is. Not. Flu.

Flu makes you feel lousy, but it only leads to serious complications in some people with underlying health issues, usually (though not exclusively) connected to pneumonia. Coronavirus can send the immune system into overdrive, and the body starts attacking its own cells, leading to multiple organ failure. People with diabetes and heart conditions are vulnerable, as well as those with lung problems (since pneumonia is also an issue). Basically, anyone with a weak immune system in the first place.

I had begun discussing with pupils the possibility of cancellations, and the precautions they should take. I am now stopping lessons completely after one Pass Plus course, which starts tomorrow and finishes Tuesday.

I had a near miss on Thursday. I texted a pupil to remind him of his lesson late Wednesday, and his mum texted back that they had ‘forgotten’ to tell me but they were self-isolating because she had a fever. Shit. I gave him a lesson the week before. Fortunately, having checked again, she just has normal flu and I’m safe. But imagine if it had been Coronavirus.

This pandemic is what you could call ‘serious shit’, and attitudes like ‘there’s nothing to worry about’ and ‘it’s just flu’ are a sure fire way of helping it be so – especially if money is the motivator for feeling that way. This isn’t just about you – it’s about a lot of other people’s lives out there. Literally, their lives.

Any vaccine is at least 12-18 months away from being available, since likely candidates are only now going into trials. The current infection is expected to peak within the next month (though no one can be certain), but it is also expected to peak even higher next winter (also, no one can be sure).

But as I have already said, those with underlying health issues are likely to die from it whenever they get it.

Another Day Of Chaos

Heavy Snow in Nottingham - 10/2/2020Caution – contains swearing.

It’s been an absolute joke, today. The A52 is still closed southbound, so traffic is having to find its way across the Trent elsewhere. But that’s why I made sure I wasn’t teaching during the rush hour.

Or, at least that was the plan. You see, I didn’t take into account the Met Office – a weather forecasting agency that gets it wrong even when it tries to tell people what it can see out of its windows.

I had a lesson at 1pm. As we drove away from his house, it began to rain. A few minutes later I commented that it was now sleet, as you could see the ice crystals on the windscreen as the drops hit. By this time we were heading up Woodborough Road towards Mapperley, and I said ‘ just watch when we get to the top – it’ll be proper snow at that altitude’. And it was, although it wasn’t settling.

Mapperley is one of the highest points in Nottingham. If it’s drizzly in the city, it’s pissing down in Mapperley. If it’s a bit hazy in Colwick, there’ll be thick fog in Mapperley. And as I predicted today, if there’s a bit of sleet down below, Mapperley will have lying snow. But I wasn’t worried, because no weather forecasts today had said we’d get any heavy snow in Nottingham. I checked.

We drove down Arnold Lane towards Gedling, and the snow got wetter as we descended and eased off. We did a circuit through Burton Joyce and Stoke Bardolph, then finished up at the Victoria Retail Park to have ago with the road layouts around there and a manoeuvre. While we were there, the snow got heavier – it was those little balls that bounce off glass – and I noticed it began to accumulate around kerbstones.

Then we headed home towards the city centre at about 2.20pm. Traffic was light around the Retail Park, and it was the same all the way back up Arnold Lane – until we got near to the top. By now, the snow was falling heavily in huge flakes, and the road was covered. The traffic came to a complete standstill and was not moving, most likely because some twat had slammed their brakes on at the bottom of the first dip and couldn’t get up the other side. We turned around and headed back down to go via a different route. Traffic was still free-moving, and we managed to get all the way through Gedling, up Carlton Hill, and through Carlton itself. Then, we were at a standstill again, just before Porchester Road. And this time there was nowhere else to go.

That was just after 2.30pm. To cut a long story short, I finally dropped the pupil off outside his house at just before 5pm. It took us over an hour to move from Nottingham High School to Russell View (a quarter of a mile) along Forest Road, and his 1.5 hour lesson had lasted 4 hours! I didn’t get home until just before 7pm. I’d cancelled my evening lesson because the pupil lives off Porchester Road with all the steep roads, and he’d told me they were bad.

The snow began at just after 1pm, and by 2pm it was falling heavily higher up. When I got home, I went to the BBC website and discovered those f***ing twats at the Met Office had issued a Yellow Warning for snow in the Midlands at 3.07pm! Over a f***ing hour after it had already fallen and caused traffic to come to a standstill.

Can someone please explain to me what the Met Office actually does? Because it sure as hell doesn’t involve predicting short-term weather conditions.

Questions, Questions, Questions…

Questions people ask search engines to find the blog. And my answers that I use with pupils, along with links to articles I’ve written on the subject previously.

Why is it important to know different terminology?

The full question was ‘why is it important to know different terminology when instructing?’

Everyone is different, with different levels of intelligence, linguistic skills, and so on. Something as simple as referring to a clock face might be a problem for people who have only ever known digital clocks on their smartphones. Or if someone didn’t have a good maths education, referring to an angle or turn in degrees will have them flummoxed. And if you have a degree in English language, using polysyllabic words (that’s one right there) that aren’t used very often on the web will come across as meaningless to many.

It’s always vital to check someone’s understanding, and to find a different way of saying it if they simply don’t get it the first time. One of the best parts of being an instructor – for me, at any rate – is trying to find the right buttons to press and switches to flip that turn on the lights in people’s heads.

Why shouldn’t you use the handbrake in an emergency stop?

The question asked was ‘what are the dangers of using the handbrake in an emergency stop?’

Modern cars have antilock braking systems (ABS). When you hit the brake hard (as in the Emergency Stop), a computer under the bonnet can detect when the wheels lock (i.e. stop turning) – if the car is still moving when this happens, it will skid. So the ABS automatically releases the brakes then grips again repeatedly until the car stops moving. This brake-release cycle is the ABS, and it repeats about 15 times every second. You can usually feel the pedal vibrate when the ABS has kicked in. Basically, ABS stops the wheels from locking (the clue is in the name).

If you are skidding with locked wheels, you have no control over where the car is going. Momentum, gravity, and the road surface make the decision for you. But since ABS allows the wheels to move a little, you can still retain some steering control when it kicks in. ABS operates on all four wheels and is hydraulically controlled.

The handbrake does not go through the ABS system, and it typically only acts on the rear wheels. It is also usually a manual system involving a cable. That means that if you pull it hard enough to lock the wheels, only the rear ones are affected and the back of the car skids and spins out. This is extremely dangerous, and can happen even at low speeds if the road surface is slippery.

On modern cars with electronic handbrakes (parking brakes), the system is slightly different. However, the car won’t let you apply the parking brake if you’re moving fast.

The handbrake is only intended to hold the car still when it is stopped, and should not be used for braking to a stop because of the risk of locking the wheels. Even in a modern car, applying the parking brake while the car is still creeping slightly (which it will allow) could be enough to slip into a gate or wall if the surface is, say, icy and on a slight slope.

Also be aware that no brake lights come on when you use the hand/parking brake, so if you brake using it, anyone behind is likely to react late and end up in the back of you.

When should I use the handbrake?

Many modern cars have advanced braking aids, such as ‘hill start assist’ and ‘foot brake assist’. They also have electronic handbrakes which are operated by a switch rather than a lever, and which disengage automatically when you pull away.

I have thought long and hard over the last five years about whether to teach people with these aids turned on (you can usually disable them). Initially, I had them turned off, but now they are becoming so common there is an increasing likelihood that the cars pupils buy once they pass will also have them fitted. So I now use ‘hill start assist’ and ‘foot brake assist’ on my lessons.

The sole purpose of the handbrake (or parking brake, as I now call it, since you don’t use your hand to apply the braking force) is to prevent the car from rolling when it is stopped or parked. Bear in mind that when the hand/parking brake is applied, the brake lights do not illuminate.

When does a signal benefit others?

The actual question was ‘what does it mean to signal only if it will benefit others?’

If you’re turning left or right, or even just changing lanes, my advice to learners is just to check your mirrors and signal, then carry out the manoeuvre if it is safe to do so. However, if there is no one around who is going to see that signal (i.e. to benefit from it), then it is not strictly necessary.

I’ve written about this before, but the upshot is that when turning left or right, in the vast majority of cases at the point where you should apply the signal you cannot possibly know if there is someone who will benefit or not, because they will be approaching from the road you want to turn into – almost always out of your view at that point – and you simply won’t know. That’s why I advise my learners always to signal for turns, and not to try and get smart about it.

The situation is slightly different if you’re just switching lanes, for example. In that case, if you can see that there is no one behind or in front of you who is going to benefit from you signalling your intentions, then you have a good argument for not doing it. The problem is that it’s only a good argument if you are right – and learners are less experienced and more likely to get it wrong. Furthermore, if they signal to change lanes on their driving test when it is absolutely not strictly necessary, no fault will be recorded (though that’s not the case on the ADI Part 3 test). But if they don’t signal and the examiner thinks they should have, it could easily be marked as a serious fault.

The same is true when pulling over and stopping, and when moving off again. If there is no one who could possibly benefit from signalling, you don’t need to do it. But the questions you might need to address are: ‘do those pedestrians need to know – even though they’re 100 metres away?’; ‘is there anyone in that van in front of me?’; ‘might someone I can’t see yet be coming the other way as I pull out from behind this parked van?’; and so on.

It can be a tricky call even for an experienced driver. For learners it is trickier still. There is no single answer, as every situation is different, but for learners it is better to play it safe rather than take risks. As long as they have done all the necessary checks, signalling when it isn’t strictly necessary isn’t a problem.

It’s also worth clarifying the original question. No one has said you must only signal if it will benefit others (well, not unless you’re going for the Golden Anorak with RoSPA or IAM). The point is that a signal is only necessary if it will benefit others, and for 99.9% of the driving population it’s better to be safe than sorry.

What do ‘S’ and ‘D’ mean on the driving test report?

On your driving test, there are three categories of fault. A driver fault (often called ‘a minor’), a serious fault (the ‘S’), and a dangerous fault (the ‘D’). You can get up to 15 driver faults and still pass, but get a 16th and you fail. You cannot get any serious or dangerous faults and still pass.

You cannot have all 15 driver faults under the same heading. For example, if you move off without checking properly (your blind spot, let’s say), if no one is around you will probably get a driver fault for it. If you do it again (and no one is around), you may still get away with it – if you’re lucky. But do it three or more times and the examiner is likely to convert it to a serious fault (one examiner once told me he went on ‘5 strikes and you’re out’, but this is not official and you cannot assume all other examiners are as lenient).

That same fault could easily be marked as a serious one the very first time you do it if someone is approaching and you don’t see them. It could be marked as a dangerous fault if the approaching vehicle is so close that there’s a chance of a collision.

Personally, I think that not checking properly should always be at least a serious fault, because if you don’t check properly you wouldn’t know if anyone was there or not, and the only difference between it being seen as a driver fault or a serious on test is that you were lucky that there wasn’t anyone coming.

How long does it take to learn to find the bite?

A recent search term was “how long to learn the bite on a new car?”

It depends on the driver. A typical beginner who has never driven before can easily pick up clutch control in just a few minutes. And over the next few hours will polish that skill as they move on to wider skills. However, it is far from rare to have people who are always going to have issues even after they pass (I can think of quite a few over the years).

As for a new car, my own experience is all I can go on. Before I became an instructor I bought a nearly new car. At the time, I only did a couple of thousand miles a year at most, and when it went for its first MOT after two years the garage told me the clutch was worn and would need ‘replacing soon’. In fact, I drove it for another four years or so, until the clutch started to slip and I had to bite the bullet.

When I went to pick it up, I couldn’t move it without stalling. Over the years, the position of the pedal where you obtained the bite had gradually risen as the clutch wore down, and I’d gotten used to it without realising it. Suddenly, the bite point was right at the bottom of the pedal’s travel – just as it will be in most new cars. My leg had a memory, and this new position came as a big surprise to it, as it tried to go higher and causing a stall. I just about cracked it in the two mile drive home, and a couple of days later, my leg was fully trained.

These days, each time I get a new car I notice no difference.

Why do I keep stalling my petrol car?

I get a lot of visitors asking this, or something very similar.

Quite simply, unless there is a definite fault with the car (which is unlikely), you are not putting enough gas on or you are lifting the clutch too quickly. It can easily be a combination of both of these, with the first making the second worse, and so virtually guaranteeing a stall.

The problem often stems from the fact that you were taught to drive in a diesel car. Most diesel engines are much more difficult to stall than petrol ones – it’s to do with the torque. It is possible that in order to teach you quickly, your instructor didn’t teach you to apply gas until you were moving. This would have been fine in their car, but as you have discovered, all they did was teach you to drive their car – and not the one you’ve now bought.

The lower risk of stalling a diesel engine would also have masked any clumsiness you may have demonstrated in finding the biting point. If you came up a bit fast or a bit too far, the diesel would take it, but a petrol car just stalls immediately if you do it the same way.

With my own pupils, I teach them firstly to find the bite smoothly and gently on a hill using no gas (and I do that in both diesel and petrol cars). If they can move and then hold the car still without braking or stalling, they will know the sort of pedal control they should be using. Then we learn to do the same by setting gas first, then moving it and holding it as before. Finally, we move on to accelerating away up the hill smoothly. Most pick it up quickly, but some take a few practice sessions to master it. In most cases, once we’ve done the exercises, we put it into practice at traffic lights and junctions, and that provides the fine tuning.

Bear in mind that if you have bought an older car, or one which hasn’t been serviced recently, it may be much more sensitive to stalling. Just remember: you need to put some gas on, and move off smoothly.

Why do my wipers smear?

Someone found the blog on ‘wipers smear after car wash’. I get a lot of hits on this.

Quite simply, it’s because you’ve got oil, wax, or something else on the glass or wiper blades. It only takes a little on either of them, and it gets spread everywhere. New cars often have a film of some sort on the glass, and this causes the same problems. None of it is that easy to get off, though there is a way.

In short, you need to get hold of some traffic film remover (TFR). You can get it from many outlets, including Amazon.

The car wash is notorious for putting it on because many use a shampoo with wax in it already. Or they put some water repellent on, which has a similar effect. Make sure you clean your wiper blades, and the space at the bottom of the windscreen where the wipers sit when not in use, otherwise it just smears back on when you use them.

What is the stopping distance in a tunnel?

It’s the same as anywhere else. People get confused by Highway Code Rule 126, which says you should leave at least a 5 metre gap between you and the car in front if you have to stop. It’s to allow free movement for people who may have to evacuate, and for the Emergency Services. It’s a separate issue.

Since visibility in a tunnel is often reduced, and people are more likely to do something stupid, it makes sense to leave greater clearance between you and the car in front while you are moving in case you have to stop suddenly. But stopping in a tunnel is no different to stopping anywhere else.

How far from the kerb when doing parallel park?

People often ask how far is too far from the kerb when parallel parking (or stopping normally).

The examiner isn’t going to get out with a tape measure or anything. In terms of doing it on your lessons, if you’re between not touching it and about a tyre’s width from the kerb – perfect! Two tyre’s widths – pushing your luck, but probably OK to the examiner. Any more than that, absolutely rubbish – and assume the examiner would think so, too.

The same goes for stopping at the side of the road. If you’re more than about two tyre’s widths away, then as far as I am concerned – if you were on a lesson with me – then you’re too far. And the examiner will almost certainly think the same.

Some examiners are extremely lenient and might let it pass even if you were wider than two tyre’s widths away, but don’t count on it. They might also let you get away with doing it once if the other attempts are OK, or if you have driven a really good test but only mess up a little on the parallel park. As I say, don’t count on it.

Some years ago, traffic wardens were out with tape measures in Nottingham and ticketing people who were more than 18″ (about 45cm, which is almost half a metre, and a bloody long way however you look at it) away from the kerb. Just use that as  rough guide as to what’s OK and what might not be, because it ties in with what I’ve already said.

Ford Sync 3 Update

I published this article in early 2019. At the time, the Ford Sync 3 system kept freezing (among other glitches). Recently, I have noticed people complaining about the problem as if it’s the end of the world. As usual, non-Ford owners are chiming in with their ‘expert’ opinions without having a clue what they’re talking about.

All it needs is a Sync 3 update. It is easy to do it yourself (though last year it was a right pain). I have recently updated another car and the update process now goes through smoothly. Read the article for details on how to do it.


Warning! Contains swear words.

Sync 3 after updatingSince I got my new Ford Focus last year (2018), it has suffered from repeated random locking-up of the radio and navigation system. The only way to reset it once it happens has been to either leave the car and lock it for a few minutes, so it resets itself, or press and hold the OFF and Fast Forward buttons for about 8 seconds. Oh, and the radio has never remembered that I have set it to show additional information (the song that is playing, for example), meaning I have to turn that feature on manually every time I get in the car).

Both methods were a pain in the arse – the latter because doing such a reset puts some settings back to the factory default (the screen colour and the clock, in particular), and the former because having to get out of the car and lock it for several minutes as a solution speaks for itself. The frozen clock has made me late for at least one appointment, and the satnav freezing has forced a change of lesson plan several times (pupils aren’t paying me to piss about with a faulty satnav, and I can’t be doing so while they’re driving because it’s dangerous).

Before I realised other Ford owners were having the same problem, I reported it to my dealer when I took it in for its service. As usual, they played dumb – they don’t have to try very hard at that in the first place – and said they’d need it in for a day to assess it, which roughly translates to several days because they won’t be able to catch what is an intermittent fault that can’t be triggered deliberately. Well, sod that! With a single lost day costing me anything up to £200 in earnings, I decided to just put up with it and moan about it again at the next service.

Ford is no better. While I was checking for any information on the issue, I did find an update to the maps for the navigation system, and I thought I may as well install it. Or rather, TRY to install it, swear a lot, then give up in frustration. I downloaded the update file from Ford’s site and the first thing was that the zip file didn’t contain the exact files Ford’s “instructions” said it should. That was a bad start. But no matter how many times I downloaded the file, unzipped it, and tried to install it, the car reported a “lst_err05” each time. I know what I’m doing, and I’d done things exactly as Ford had written them. The error message gave a number to call, which amounted to a recorded message advising me to call a premium rate number. Thieving bastards! As I say, I just gave up.

In the meantime, the locking up problem continued it’s random appearances unabated.

Anyway, I discovered today (April 2019) that there is now a Sync 3 update which has been issued in the last few days. And when I checked, it showed up for my car’s VIN. I downloaded it (twice, eventually, because you can guess where this is going), and followed the instructions to the letter. After about 8 tries across two complete downloads of the 2.9GB zipped update file, every attempt to do the install resulted in a “pkg_err03”. I was well pissed off by this time.

Ford’s idiot instructions are written as though intended to guide monkey through complex calculus in order to crack an egg. And in Swahili, just to make it easier. Pretty much along the same lines as Ford’s vehicle handbooks, actually, where the term “radio” doesn’t appear in the f***ing index, and is implied under “audio” or “Sync 3” instead. Or the fact that 90% of the content relates to premium features that 90% of owners don’t have on their bog-standard Zetecs. Christ, mine’s a Titanium, and it hasn’t got most of what they put in there.

I digress. The point is that Ford states that you must format a suitable memory stick – it doesn’t say any particular ones are unsuitable, just that they need to be at least 4GB – using exFAT, that you should unzip the update file directly to the stick, and that the folder structure mustn’t be changed. It states that there should be two files and a folder in the root directory on the stick once this is done.

Problem. If you extract directly to the stick, the zipped package is extracted into a single folder with the stated directory structure inside it – and that’s a no-no, because the files inside this top-level folder need to be in the top level of the stick’s directory in order for the car to recognise it as an update. So you have to do a bit of file/folder moving first.

Problem. Although Ford doesn’t state this in their instructions, you need to make sure you have turned off all Wi-Fi and bluetooth functions, and that you have nothing connected to any other USB ports. You don’t quite need to go as far as enclosing the car in a Faraday cage 200 metres underground, but that’s a close call from what I can gather.

Problem. Based on what I found today, the car might not like some brands of memory stick or ones which are, say 128GB. I can’t be 100% certain about that, but I have my suspicions from what was happening earlier.

Problem. Ford’s instructions outline a plethora of screens and buttons you have to touch to initiate the process if you get past one of the error messages telling you to go and get scammed on that premium rate number. Once I finally got it going this afternoon, mine apparently didn’t do anything until I noticed the “Updating System Files” message along the top of the screen. It had started up automatically and it finished automatically without any interaction from me at any stage, apart from inserting the stick into the USB port.

Problem. Don’t plug the stick in, then start the engine. Instead, start the engine, wait until the system has given any messages it has decided it will annoy you with today, then plug in the stick.

Problem. You have to leave the engine running while you do the update, and it takes anywhere from 20-60 minutes to complete. It is illegal to leave your car with the engine running unattended unless it’s in your back yard, and stupid if you don’t lock and bar the gates if that’s where you’re doing it. Or you can just be bored for a while as you sit there waiting. In my case, it finally fired up just as I was leaving for a lesson, and it completed just as I got there (the radio kept working throughout, so I wasn’t bored at all).

Problem. The stick doesn’t have to be formatted exFAT, as Ford says. FAT32 works, which is what I’d formatted to after the 8 previous failures with exFAT. I was experimenting, and this was the next attempt.

Problem. Once the update is complete – and all the things Ford says will happen have happened – the update apparently isn’t complete after all. At some point about 2 hours after you think you’ve done it, the system will throw up a message telling you you’ve got to connect to a network to complete the process, on pain of not having full functionality of some features if you don’t.

Problem. From what a reader told me recently, her dealer has told her that automatic updates don’t work in the UK, so the f**king message won’t go away. The only way to stop it is to turn off WiFi, which is what I have done.

Summarising the process, then:

  • download the update file from Ford
  • format a 4GB memory stick to FAT32 (don’t use the stick for anything else once you format)
  • unzip the update file directly to the stick
  • copy the contents of the folder thus created out of the folder thus created and into the root directory of the stick
  • delete the original folder (anything else in the root directory with a remotely update-recognisable name might make the process go titsup, so don’t risk it)
  • turn off Wi-Fi, Bluetooth, and everything else relating to networking on your car’s system
  • disconnect EVERYTHING from the USB ports in your car
  • make a flask of tea to take into the car with you, and make sure you’ve been to the loo
  • pack some books or other reading material
  • get in the car, close the doors, and start the engine
  • disable Auto Off
  • let it get any helpful messages out of its system, particularly those you have to acknowledge or dismiss by pressing things
  • take a deep breath and plug the stick into the USB data port (on the Focus, it’s the one with a white light around it in the storage compartment under the heater controls)

If you’re lucky, the update will start. As I mentioned, mine just started and completed without any input from me whatsoever, but knowing Ford, that doesn’t mean you won’t see all the screens Ford says you will. The bottom line is that you want to see positive messages about progress, and no error messages at all. At the end, you want it to tell you it has successfully updated, and that it will be effective from next time you start the car (it did on mine). Oh, and you need to forget about your UK Focus being able to connect to the internet for updates, because no matter what network you apparently connect to, nothing happens.

I haven’t had a lock up yet, but that doesn’t prove anything, because it’s only been a few hours since the update. There’s a new button on the main radio screen that lets you turn on radio text (track playing) instead of having to go to Settings >> Radio >> Additional Information then back to the main screen. But it now remembers what I set it to anyway, and so this is not important now.

Update: no lock ups at all in the month since doing this.

Update 24/11/2019: I recently took delivery of a new car (2019 registration). I checked my VIN in Ford’s database and there was an update for it. I downloaded the package, unzipped it to a freshly exFAT formatted 4GB stick, and put the stick in the USB socket as I set off on a lesson. It installed flawlessly in about 30 minutes (no messages apart from “Updating” at the top). Onced it says it is finished, you have to get out, lock the car, and let the radio switch off (a couple of minutes) for the update to take effect. No obvious visual changes that I could see, so it must be bug fixes and background improvements.

Update 24/11/2019: A reader tells me he’s had problems with his audio speakers stopping working, and Ford has admitted this is a fault which is being addressed through a forthcoming software update. I’m not sure if that fix was included in the update I did, though I had not experienced the problem he mentioned. However, I am experiencing issues with the driver window bouncing back open when I close it (I’ve since discovered that’s got nothing to do with Sync 3).

Do you get a message telling you when the update is finished?

Yes. It tells you the update will be active when you turn off the car, get out and lock it, and wait a few minutes until the radio powers off.

You’re also supposed to upload the log file created on your memory stick during the process so that the Ford database knows your car is up to date, and so won’t keep telling you there’s an update available.

Can you still use navigation while Sync 3 is updating?

Why on earth would you want to do that? It only takes half an hour.

However, the short answer is that I don’t know. But if I was doing it again, I wouldn’t even try. If it messed things up, I’d possibly have no navigation at all and would likely have to take it to a dealer. I’m not risking that.

Working On Christmas Day

Christmas baublesSpare a thought for the people who have to work on Christmas Day – the police, ambulance, and fire service in particular. They don’t really have much choice, but they provide a valuable service that can’t take holidays.

As far as driving instructors are concerned, what with being self-employed and all, taking holidays is always a juggling act between earning a living wage and staying healthy and sane.

Personally, I have never worked Christmas Day because no one has ever asked me to. In the early days, if anyone ever had asked, then it is possible I might have said yes. But for as long as I can remember now I have always taken Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and Boxing Day off. Actually, that’s not completely accurate, because until only a few years ago I didn’t automatically block Christmas Eve – I even remember at least one test that day (and it was a pass) – but I gave up on it because people would book it, then cancel at the last minute (even though I’d reminded them it was Christmas Eve and they might have other things to do).

Of course, being self-employed means that money matters. As I said, no one has ever asked, but if I did get a request to conduct a lesson on Christmas Day I reckon I’d quote £100 per hour, with a minimum of two hours. I’d still not be totally happy doing it if it didn’t put them off, but… well, money talks, as they say.

But before you start dissing other instructors who do work on Christmas Day, just remember that not everyone is Christian or recognises Christmas as anything other than a normal day. So it is quite likely any driving lessons you see being carried out on December 25th are being conducted by those people. Or it’s someone who’s earning a pile of money for a couple of hours work. They’re doing nothing wrong, and it doesn’t involve you or require your assessment, so just let them get on with it.

Air Conditioning In Cars

Fogged up windowsThis is an old article from 2013, but it is due an update. When I originally published it, one of the show-me-tell-me questions was:

Show me how you would set the demister controls to clear all the windows effectively. This should include both the front and rear screens.

At the time of updating, the relevant show & tell questions (they changed the name) are:

When it’s safe to do so, can you show me how you’d set the rear demister?

When it’s safe to do so, can you show me how you’d demist the front windscreen?

For the windscreen – that’s the one on the front of the car – the universally correct answer would be that you’d switch the airflow to blow out of the vents on the rear of the dashboard up at the windscreen, turn up the fan speed, and increase the temperature of the air from these vents. That would work for any car, although the actual knobs to twist and buttons to press will vary from model to model.

For the rear window, you’d turn on the electric heater that warms those little metal wires stuck to, or embedded in, the glass. There will be a button somewhere on the dashboard that turns it on and off.

You will note that the original broad question has now been changed to two rather more specific ones. This is relevant, because most newer cars also have air conditioning, electrically heated front windows, and often a button labelled as “MAX”, which turns everything on to demist all the windows very quickly at the same time. One press and you turn on the front and rear window electric heaters, the air conditioning, and redirect the hottest air possible at the windscreen (and often the side windows, as well, if your car has that feature).

When asked the original show-me-tell-me question, operating the MAX button was a perfectly correct response – as were playing around with the air flow controls, using the heated front windscreen if you had one, and turning on the rear window heater. However, with the much more specific Tell questions currently used, pushing the MAX button isn’t strictly the right response to either of them. It is also worth noting that whereas the original question would have been asked whilst stationary, if either of these new ones are asked, it will be while the candidate is driving. Ever since they started doing it this way, I’ve had nightmares about people fiddling with buttons and dials while taking a bend and losing control (I know the examiner would prevent that, but at the very least it would result in a test fail).

Arguably, operating the MAX button is a satisfactory response to either question, because it will achieve the desired result. But it is technically not the correct response if you’re being pedantic about it, because it does several other things at the same time.

It makes sense to understand all the controls rather than just blindly push buttons and twist knobs. If nothing else, if you inadvertently turn the car into a sauna, you ought to know how to turn the temperature back down again – and you’d be surprised by how many people can’t work out for themselves that if you turn something on by pressing a button or flicking a switch, you can usually turn it off by pressing the button again, or flicking the switch the other way. It also means that if you respond to the examiner’s question by pressing the MAX button, you’ll probably be able to recover if he specifically asks you to demist either the front or back – but not both.

How does the air-blower demist windows?

It involves a bit of science, but it is enough to know that hot air will demist windows, whereas cooler air probably won’t.

The reason it works is down to relative humidity. Air can hold water vapour as a gas, but if the amount of vapour reaches the maximum that the air can hold, it precipitates out – condenses – as water droplets. That’s the “mist” on the glass. The problem is that the maximum amount of vapour the air can hold before condensation occurs gets less and less the colder the air is. If you refer to water vapour in air as the “humidity”, then the amount of vapor relative to the maximum possible is the “relative humidity”. In summer, a relative humidity (RH) of 70% might feel horribly sticky and sweaty – but there’d be no condensation. In winter, you can easily get 100% without feeling it because there’s a lot less moisture there– but since there’s no room for any more vapour in the air, any extra causes condensation to take place. Think of it as a bucket overflowing, where the colder it is, the smaller the bucket is.

What happens is that on cold mornings, with the air at – or very closer to – 100% RH, as soon as you get in the car, breathing and perspiring, you overflow the bucket and condensation takes place. You see it on the glass as mist, but everywhere feels slightly damp. When you initially turn on the heater, it is blowing cold air, and if anything you get even more misting. But as the car warms up, it starts to blow warmer air. This warm air can hold more water vapour, and it evaporates the mist as it blows across it and keeps hold of it.

What does the air conditioning do?

Air conditioning (A/C) units pass the air over a radiator filled with coolant – just like what you have in your fridge at home. If you look back at what I said about humidity, above, you can probably work out that if you cool very moist air, you send it above 100% RH. The excess moisture – and if you cool humid air at 30°C down to 8°C, there’ll be a lot of it – condenses out (usually as a pool of water under your car in summer if you’re stopped), and much cooler and drier air is blown into the car. You can play around with the temperature of the air that is blown in by passing it over the heater radiator, so you have crude climate control.

Since it removes moisture, A/C is extremely efficient at demisting and preventing further misting.

How do the heated windows work?

In a similar way to the air blower. As they heat up they create an area around the metal wires which is warmer and so the mist evaporates back into the air. They work best in conjunction with the car heater, which heats the bulk of the air in the car, and which can then keep hold of the vapour, preventing condensation. They work even better with the A/C, because it strips the vapour out and dumps it outside the car. The MAX switch activates everything in one go.

How do you control these features?

It varies from car to car, but for the heater blower, there will be several rotary controls usually located in the centre of the dashboard and below the level of the steering wheel.

Heater controls

One of them controls the speed (and noise) of the fan, one controls the temperature (blue is cool, red is warmer), and another allows you to select which vents and grilles the air will be blown through (at your feet, at your face, at both, or at the windscreen – possibly with other combinations).

Higher spec cars may have digital temperature displays, and some will have independent control for each side of the car. Some will even have controls in the rear for back seat passengers.

Heated Front Window Symbol

Heated Rear Window SymbolThe heated rear window button will have an icon like the one on the left, and the heated front windscreen will have one like that shown to the right.

The air conditioning will be activated with a button or switch marked A/C, and the MAX button (which activates all of these features) may also have one of the window icons.

Isn’t the heated windscreen for de-icing?

Not specifically, no. It serves the exact same purpose as the heated rear window – to demist. However, every demisting feature in the car can also de-ice if necessary. Even blowing cold air can lead to de-icing if it isn’t too cold, because the air passing through even a cold car is still warmer than that outside. However, a heated front window is noticeably useful at de-icing since that’s the very window that needs de-icing the most.

Having said that, a heated windscreen is only good at melting frost or dislodging a thin layer of rimed ice. If you think it’s going to get rid of a couple of inches of snow, think again. It doesn’t actually get that hot – if it did, it could cause the glass to shatter.

Why do my windows steam up in summer if it’s been raining?

That’s because water cools as it evaporates. If it’s already humid when it rains, the air passing over the windscreen evaporates the rain drops, so you get cooling around them. The humid air inside the car is then above 100% RH close to these spots on the windscreen, and condensation occurs. You usually see it around spots of rain.

You can also get it if you’ve had the A/C on. It cools the windscreen right down, so when you turn the A/C off and humid air gets back in, the cold zone near the glass sends the RH there above 100% and condensation occurs. In this case, misting is more uniform, but often concentrated on the lower part of the windscreen where the A/C has been blowing.

So what should I tell the examiner on my test?

Your best bet is to answer the question he’s asking you. If he asks how you demist the back window, operate the heated rear window switch or button. If he asks how to demist the front, either demonstrate how to redirect the air flow and increase the temperature and fan speed, or operate the heated windscreen button or switch (if your car has it).

In Nottingham, examiners have not been querying use of the MAX button, so use it by all means – but just make sure you know how to activate just one of the features as necessary if your examiner presses you on the subject. You are being tested on “safe driving for life”, so you ought to know what the buttons do anyway – you’re going to need to if you pass.

Since these questions are asked while you’re driving (and since you’ll be driving when you use them once you pass), be careful not to stare down and lose control of the car.

Ford Focus Yo-Yo Windows

Ford Focus One-Touch Window ButtonsMy Focus has one-touch electric windows. On my last car, shortly before it was due for a service, the driver-side window developed a fault whereby when it was closed and hit the top of the frame, it bounced half way back down. What I had to do was carefully inch it up and make sure it didn’t hit the top each night when I got home and locked it up. There was still a small gap, though, but it had a service booked and we had no rain, so it wasn’t an issue.

The dealer fixed it and simply said it had been “reset”. I had no further problems with it.

I have another car now, and it has started doing the same thing. It isn’t anywhere near ready for a service yet, so in order to avoid the inevitable assessment visit and probable brake bleed my dealer would insist on before fixing it under warranty, I looked into it a little further. And big surprise, it is quite common on Fords (and other makes, apparently).

From what I can gather, the reset procedure is to put the window all the way up holding the button, and then keep it held for 3 seconds. Then, push the button and put the window all the way down, then keep it held for another 3 seconds.

But that doesn’t work by itself, because as soon as the window hits the top of the frame, down it comes again. It seems to be connected with the safety feature that prevents idiot kids (and dogs) getting their heads squashed if the window goes up while they’re leaning out. A sensor detects the resistance and winds the window back down again.

The trick is to use a piece of paper or thin card when you do the reset. Hold it just under the top window frame recess and put the window up. Hold the button for 3 seconds. The paper acts as a cushion and prevents the sensor triggering. Now put the window down and hold the button for 3 seconds. That should now have reset the sensor and the window goes up and stays up.

It ought to go without saying – but I’d better say it anyway – do not use anything hard as your cushion, otherwise you’re likely to break the glass. Use paper, and fold it once or twice as necessary to get enough cushioning to stop the auto-retraction kicking in while you do the reset. And keep your bloody fingers out of the way when you’re doing it. Don’t say I didn’t warn you!

My windows bounce back when they reach the top

You may have a faulty motor or sensor, but from my experience it is most likely just needs a reset. Follow the instructions above. That should reset it.

My windows come down on their own

I have read that on some models there is a feature which automatically opens the windows when it gets hot – even when it is unattended, and sometimes in the middle of the night. I have also read that the windows in some cars can be controlled from the key fob, and this can get pressed whilst in someone’s pocket. The sources for this are various web forums, and are not really to be trusted, but even if such a feature existed, I can’t believe that would be available in the UK because the car would get stolen almost immediately in some areas.

It is possible you need to do the sensor reset without knowing it, and the windows actually opened before you locked it up but you didn’t notice. That’s just a thought, and I’m not saying it’s right. But the first time I experienced the bounce back I didn’t realise until I went out again and saw the window open.

If I woke up to open windows, I’d book it into my dealer pronto.

Nextbase Dashcams – 612GW

I’ve had a Nextbase 612GW for over a year now (that’s the Amazon link there). It records in 4k – meaning that you can see number plates and other details much further away and much more clearly than on other dashcams.

I’m actually on my second unit. Within a year, my first one stopped turning on automatically, and after discussions with Nextbase, they gave me an authorisation code so that Amazon would accept the return and refund me. I bought another in lieu of the refund.

What had happened was that the internal battery had died. It would barely run for 30 seconds after a four hour recharge, and since it is the battery that provides the camera with enough residual power to detect when the power systems in the car are activated (which tells it to turn on and start recording), it was kaput. It worked perfectly if I powered it on manually each morning once a bit of charge had gone to the battery, but any power down lasting more than an hour and the battery would drain again.

Any 4k video device right now gets warm when it is in use, and the 612GW is no exception. I wouldn’t say it gets hot, but certainly very warm, and with the summer we had in 2018, it got warmer still. Li-ion and Li-Po batteries are degraded by high temperatures, and I suspect that overall this contributed to the battery going as quickly as it did. OK, it may also have been a bad batch (or just a bad one in my case), but I didn’t go into that with Nextbase. I’d had it replaced, after all.

It is worth noting that Nextbase told me replacing the battery is quite easy, and they supply them if you ask. It does involve a bit of soldering, but I will bear it in mind for the future.

As I understand it, some cheaper dashcams use a capacitor to hold residual power. However, where a battery is involved, this problem of degradation could occur with any model of camera. Indeed, any battery-based dashcam will effectively “break” sooner or later once the battery dies. Exactly the same thing happens with laptops, phones, and tablets – and it is amazing how many people don’t realise it’s just a dud battery which, in many cases, could easily be replaced. It even used to happen with desktop computers, when the coin battery which held the BIOS settings that enabled the PC to boot died (I’ve replaced a fair few of those in the past for people who thought their PC was broken).

I suspect that a lot of the complaints you see about dashcams dying could be a result of this – along with using the wrong types of SD card.

Not The Magic Money Tree Again?

They’re at it again. Someone has asked for advice on car leasing, and one of the replies (answering the wrong question, anyway) has stated that someone on a franchise pays £1,000 a month, whereas if you buy your own car and go independent, you save £1,000 a month.

How many more bloody times? NO. YOU. DON’T!

However you obtain your car, you have an ongoing cost associated with it. Unless you’re driving a 15 year old banger that never goes wrong, needs no maintenance or servicing, never has anything wear out or get a nail in it, and doesn’t need insurance, you are probably paying at least £250 a month for it all told. If it’s less than about 8 years old, this overhead cost could easily be £400-£500.

It isn’t just about how much you are paying for it per month if it’s on hire purchase. Or how much you initially paid. You have to factor in depreciation and having to replace it periodically, any maintenance, insuring it (lots of complaints about insurance hikes lately), getting dual controls fitted/removed, repairs, and so on. It isn’t costing you “nothing”. It’s costing a lot more than nothing.

Even if there is someone out there who has a banger, and does all their own servicing and repairs, they still have to get hold of parts and consumables. The equipment they use to do the work has got to be paid for somehow. And so does the time it would take them to do it – how on earth can you be a full time ADI if you are also a part time mechanic?

There is absolutely no such thing as an instructor car that “costs nothing”. But there are a hell of a lot of ADIs who don’t understand this.

I’ve explained it before in the article Should I Become A Driving Instructor?