Diary Of An ADI - A Driving Instructor's Blog

UK Faces Farmland Shortage

26/06/2014

This story on the BBC website comes at the same time I have noticed a “for sale” sign covering 10 acres of farmland just to the south of Ruddington on the A60. Now, farmland being up for sale when it is advertised as “arable land” isn’t too worrying. But when the sign has got names like FHP Living on it, and no mention of arable land, you have to start wondering what the hell they are going to build on it. Ruddington green belt and farmland

Actually, with a name like FHP Living involved you don’t have to think too hard – it’s only a matter of time before a sign appears which declares “Coming Soon – A development of affordable 3- and 4-bedroom homes”. That will then be followed by months of road works on the A60 as the services are installed in the most incompetent and lazy way possible, and then a dense cluster of ugly shoeboxes will appear and the countryside will have taken another kicking from Nottingham City Council.

I’m fairly certain that when this land was first put up for sale over a year ago it was advertised as farmland – but that is conspicuously absent from the hoardings now. My best estimate of the area involved is shown in red on the aerial photo above. You have Ruddington to the north, and Bradmore to the south of it. Everywhere else is fields and woodlands.

You see, Nottingham – certainly on the south side – ends very abruptly. For example, as you leave Clifton and head towards Gotham you immediately hit undisturbed countryside and farmland. Except Nottingham City Council has decided that it is going to build on this. This article in the Nottingham Post has a very telling comment:

Michael Sheppard, chairman of Gotham Parish Council, said: …“You just can’t pin anyone down on it and I think the only reason they are even having this consultation is because it is a legal requirement.”

Yep. That would be Nottingham City Council down to a tee. They’re going to screw up that land no matter what, and they will use every dirty trick they can to avoid anyone spoiling it for them.

They’ve already screwed up land near the proposed site for these new homes with their other pet project – The Tram. The same article also quotes a local farmer:

I am not looking at it just from my point of view but for the country. They may want houses but in 20 or 30 years time, those people will need feeding too.

On this land alone, there is the potential for growing 1,000 tons of grain. They will ruin this and are doing so across the country with little land grabs here and there.

Piece by piece we are losing essential farmland and what are people going to eat in 20 years time?

He’s dead right. Mind you, in many cases it is the farmers who are to blame – once the £ signs start rolling in front of their faces, they quickly realise they can make more money in 5 minutes selling off 10 acres of land for building houses on than they ever could growing crops.

The trouble is, building on greenbelt is the easy option. All it needs is one greedy farmer close to retirement age, and one incompetent council which is staffed by people who couldn’t get a real job so ended up in local government, and all the problems are solved,

Nottingham has dozens of places which are an eyesore, and which should be bulldozed – yet they have stood empty for decades. Yet documents like this show clearly that Nottingham City Council is selling them off instead of using them to build their bloody housing developments. Then, to make matters worse, you have Rushcliffe Borough Council trying to move the barriers which define greenbelt land so that it can build on the Sharphill Woods nature reserve.

I could be wrong about that Ruddington site – but I bet I’m not. It’s no wonder we’re going to end up short of home-grown food, though, with Nottingham City Council involved.

Cost Of Theory Test To Fall By 25%

23/06/2014

DOAADI

ADI, Driving Tests, DVSA, News, Transport

They put this out for consultation a few months ago. Amongst various things, they were asking for opinions about cutting the price of the Theory Test, which currently costs a mere £31 (well, a bit more if you’re stupid and pay for it via a scam site).

In my response, I made it clear that as far I was concerned the current price was fine as it was. Unfortunately, someone somewhere is after votes for next year’s General Election and dropping the price is the chestnut they were going to roast come hell or high water. The “consultation” was just a pointless exercise to show that they “listen” to the public.

As you can see in the DVSA email alert I linked to above:

The cost of the driving theory test will be cut by 25%, saving learner drivers over £100 million over the next 9 years.

Let’s just set the record straight here. That “£100 million over the next 9 years” is going to be split between around 13 million tests. It isn’t going to save ANY learner more than £8 for each time they attempt the test. That doesn’t look anywhere near as vote worthy, does it? A mere £8 versus £100 million. It’s also going to be phased, with £6 coming off this October, and another £2 next year.

And don’t even get me started on how it doesn’t save anyone anything if they never had to pay the higher fee in the first place. That’s like saying that when I go out and buy a pocket calculator for £5, I am saving over £80 because of how much they used to cost when they first came out. I’m not saving anything.

The real point is that the theory test lasts about 90 minutes, which breaks down to around £21 per hour. Allowing for building rent, systems maintenance, staff salaries (at least two staff), and so on, it is hard to see how the test can possibly be maintained for even £21 an hour, let alone £15 instead. I know enough about outsourcing to understand the true costs involved, and someone somewhere is ultimately losing money on this – or they will if the market shifts unpredictably in the medium term future.

Alastair Peoples can go on forever about having “secured” a lower price for the outsourcing contract (from which one must conclude that Pearson VUE has lost the contract, or else what the hell were they charging for up until now?) It is Stephen Hammond – LibCon Transport Minister – on a vote hunt which is at the root:

We want to keep costs down for all motorists – that’s why we have frozen fuel duty – and by reducing the cost of the theory test we will save aspiring motorists around £9 million annually.

As I say, it’s total bollocks. No one is saving “£9 million annually”. Each learner will save a mere £6 (going up to £8 in 18 months’ time) each time they take a test – and even then, if they turn 17 after the price falls, they have saved NOTHING. The only positive thing is that someone somewhere else is going to have to squander £9 million less than they have been doing previously.

Assholes Out In Force At The Moment

23/06/2014

DOAADI

Bad Drivers

I don’t know why, but in the last few days I have had dozens of complete tossers doing the most stupid things around me and my pupils.

I already wrote about the silver Toyota (reg. SJI 5262) which had parked in the full knowledge that they were causing a major blockage outside the Methodist Church on Rivergreen in Clifton. I noticed today that No Waiting signs have been fixed to the fence now, so it will be interesting to see which idiots ignore those, or if they bring their wire cutters to remove them (having already stolen the cones).

Then there was the black Mercedes, reg. X922 DCU, which dangerously overtook, then undertook, and then cut another car up on Manvers Street today. The driver looked like a potato with a walnut stapled to it. If the police are looking in, they might want to pull this prat over and do a check on his window tints – the front ones look illegal.

There was also the bronze Honda Civic, reg. ET57 TBO, driven by an Indian woman which pulled out extremely dangerously at the Dunkirk roundabout and headed down University Boulevard. My pupil was almost in front of her when she decided to go.

Next, there was the black Renault Clio, reg. FH63 EFP, which cut us up dangerously at the Wheatcroft roundabout.

Similarly, a red Fiesta, reg. FJ10 TDZ, cut us up even more dangerously on Radcliffe Road in West Bridgford.

Let’s not forget the blue Mazda 3, reg. ND54 UWH, which overtook at speed – on a bend – on Pennyfoot Street in the City Centre.

And then there was the red Ford Ka, drive by a zit face, reg. YF55 NLC, which overtook at high speed near a crossing and over speed bumps in Clifton. Definitely one for the police to keep an eye out for.

But probably the best one has to be the woman in the blue Meriva, reg. FP53 TYG. We were driving past the top shops in Clifton, where they have installed the high-kerb tram islands, and where the lanes are only wide enough for one car (or a tram), and this stupid bitch stopped – right in the middle of the road – to let one of her offspring out. The kid then ran across the road to the shops right in front of us. The woman – probably the unfit mother (based on observation of what I saw) of the child in question – then attempted to stop in the bus bay, thought better of it, then did a dangerous U-turn at the T-junction where the roundabout used to be. Her indicators were going left and right like disco lights. It’s dangerous enough just turning left or right – but a U-turn? Rather than the police, I’d suggest that the Social Services should be looking into this one.

All this occurred in the last two days. A few others got lucky, in that I couldn’t remember what they’d done when I came to look at my hastily scribbled notes. Perhaps next time, eh?

Why 11-Year Olds SHOULDN’T Be Taught To Drive

22/06/2014

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ADI, Education, News, Training

One from the newsfeeds drags the old chestnut about teaching 11-year olds to drive. I’ve written about this before, most recently last year, but it goes back further.

Let’s not try and disguise the fact that the main beneficiaries are the people who provide these lessons – not those who take them. A normal, quality learner lesson costs about £23-£25, but these things are charged at £60 an hour. There is absolutely no way the vast majority of those taking them are going to get up to test standard at that price, and the “lessons” amount to little more than a ride round a go-kart track in a real car. Indeed, I recently took on a pupil who had had one of these sessions, and in absolute honesty you couldn’t tell. She was no different to someone who’d sat in the car on a driveway or in a car park with mum or dad and made the car go forward a bit.

In one of my earlier articles on this subject I quoted one 11-year old driving a car for the first time as saying:

How cool is this?

That was in 2012. He will be 13 now, and still has at least four years to go before he can drive legally. Unless mummy and daddy have kept up the lessons (and they’ll have forked out up to £1,500 by now even at one lesson a month, assuming he hasn’t got bored of driving round the same circuit) he will have done nothing.

This current story is almost an exact parallel:

[name removed] is 11 and was very excited at the prospect of driving a car for the first time.

I’ll bet he was. And I’ll also bet that it will come as a major disappointment when he realises that unless mummy and daddy have very deep pockets, it will also be the last time for at least the next six years. Well, legally, anyway.

Then there is this comment:

Given [name removed] is just 5ft he was given three cushions to make sure he was high enough to see over the steering wheel and reach the all important pedals.

Or, in other words, he is too small to drive safely in the first place. And even then, going by the photo, he is barely at eye-level with the steering wheel.

And the most telling comment:

As the hour lesson goes on his confidence is clearly building and we are getting quicker.

Oh dear. Getting “quicker”. And there we have the common denominators in the majority of accidents involving new drivers – over-confident and too fast for their ability.

These courses do absolutely nothing to help children’s’ Immature and juvenile minds, and they simply cannot handle adult activities like driving. Nor should they be expected to, and they definitely shouldn’t be encouraged to try.

Trams, Idiots, And Automobiles

19/06/2014

DOAADI

ADI, General, Roadworks, Transport

People may not have noticed, but I am not a tram person. This is especially true when I am anywhere near the utter chaos that is the result of the current tram extension work. Clifton is a nightmare no matter where you go. But it is made worse by people like this:

This is Rivergreen in Clifton, where it joins Southchurch Drive near to the swimming baths, The tram is going down Southchurch, and at the moment it is down to a single lane controlled by three-way lights. Buses turn into Rivergreen, which is a narrow road made worse by parking at the best of times. However, they have had problems with morons like this (registration number SJI 5262) parking outside the Methodist Church. Recently there have been “no parking” cones put there, but this being Clifton someone has stolen them (they might even be in the boot of this prat’s car).

I came down here this morning with a pupil. What you can’t see is that there are two more cars parked just behind us – spaced apart slightly. The sign on the left says “wait here”, and the lights have a sensor on the top to detect when traffic approaches. There was no way we could get to the stop line without blocking the road, and even where I stopped the pupil we were still actually in the way, especially if a bus had turned in. Shortly after this, several cars did turn in, and I had to edge us forward to give them space. This imbecile was about two car lengths from the stop line.

I often wonder why it is that people with private plates behave like the biggest tossers. This particular one could have parked a few metres down the road, but that would have been too simple. It was probably some old fart who thought they had some sort of special rights. Anyone with any sense – and believe me, there are quite a few people who park here who obviously have no sense at all – would have deliberately kept away from the lights.

As it is, you can’t help but think that all Methodists are idiots. They certainly seem to be in Clifton.

Flashbacks To The Rat Race Era

19/06/2014

DOAADI

Funny, General

I’ve always been a fan of the Dilbert comic strip. I think it’s because Scott Adams bases every strip on his own experiences in the rat race, and supplements it with examples submitted by readers who are still suffering. In other words, it’s pretty much true to life.

I updated my book collection recently with some new Dilberts. As a result, I had a few nasty nightmares at the reminder of what I had to put up with. This one deserves some comment:

I have forgotten now the number of times that the idiot managers at the idiot company I worked for behaved exactly like this. Most of them had read about computers somewhere, but that was about as far as their knowledge went. In the latter days I was trying to get them to accept electronic signatures, but this was opposed by the Quality Control department (who effectively bottlenecked everything we did) in favour of antiquated pen and paper.

Most of the senior QC people couldn’t use email properly, and they therefore refused to answer any question via that method. Their messages – if you ever got one – were restricted to short one liners, or entire cut-and-pasted documents from their secretaries. The other problem was that these people lived for meetings and you could rarely catch any of them in their offices. Getting quick answers was impossible, and scheduling a meeting with them was equally frustrating since you were after an answer today – often, for a job that was sitting half-finished in the factory – but couldn’t get on their calendars for a week or more. All the QC people authorised to sign off paperwork only ever attended meetings – they had no other obvious function, and it was often years since they had held a test tube or carried out any sort of chemical analysis. Then, when you finally did get hold of someone (and I have one particular guy in mind here), instead of an answer he would give you “something to think about”, which was bloody useless.

In fact, this guy was virtually (but not quite) the only approved QC signatory for all of the production paperwork we had to write, primarily as a result of the general ignorance of the rest of them outside their rigid empires. You’d write a production process document for a new job, run it past everyone and his dog, get them all to sign it (a total of at least six signatures were required, sometimes including several from the customer), then submit it to this guy in QC. It would inevitably come back with a load of major “think about this” comments scribbled all over it. He did this even on documents which were merely copies of ones he’d approved previously (i.e. when we were doing a repeat job). Customers were doing their nuts over it, never mind about me.

These QC people were the same ones who had argued that all pocket calculators had to be properly validated – every single one of the thousands that were in use, and the tens of thousands that would have been used in the next few years. It would have required validation protocols in huge numbers. It never happened – and there was no way it ever would have. But it provided the opportunity for hundreds of meetings on the subject.

It was these technophobes in QC who called the shots over electronic signatures. The most technophobic were also the most senior, and arguing with them was heresy in itself. Let’s just say that I was definitely a heretic. The irony is that you can be certain that they are now accepting electronic signatures. The company that took them over will almost certainly have insisted on it.

Nottingham Gridlocked 18/06/2014

18/06/2014

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ADI, Training, Transport

I had to cancel a lesson tonight because of the traffic. As far as I can tell, the tram road works, the gas road works, the electricity road works, road works due to “improvements” to the various junctions along the ring road, numerous road works due to the building of proto-slum dwellings, road works due to resurfacing work, road works due to sewer repairs, etc. – all of which cannot cope with the volumes of traffic likely to occur outside the range 1am until 4am at the best of times – there had been an incident on the M1 which had apparently resulted in M1 traffic using the above road work sites as a “quick” shortcut.

Even as late as 6.30pm, there was gridlock going into Beeston towards Long Eaton from Clifton Bridge onwards. There was gridlock going north along the ring road towards Mansfield. And there was gridlock on the A52 going south towards Melton and Grantham, beginning at Clifton Bridge. In other words, it was impossible to get from one side of Nottingham to the other, no matter which way you attempted it. However, it was totally clear between the QMC and Clifton Bridge, so I’m certain Cllr Jane Urquhart will weight this in such a way that it is portrayed as a major success for the tram system.

Virgin Media Broadband

17/06/2014

DOAADI

Computers & Tech

This is an old post. Less than ten years later, my speed is 1,000Mb/s. Times change quickly.

I mentioned back in January that my broadband speed was a healthy 126Mb/s following an automatic upgrade. Well, I just had another.

I’m now up to 160Mb/s. However, there are still people out there who argue that 10Mb/s is enough for anyone.

I think it is known as jealousy in some circles, and technophobia in others.

Incidentally, the best broadband speed test can by obtained using Ookla.

In-Car Video Cameras (Update)

13/06/2014

DOAADI

ADI, Computers & Tech, General

In-car cameras are in the news at the moment. Personally, I have been experimenting with them since 2009. My favoured device at the time was not designed as an in-car camera, but it worked perfectly for what I wanted to do back then. My biggest gripe with the purpose-designed cameras in the intervening period has been that the field of vision is too wide and everything is distorted. I wanted HD-quality, but that’s no good if everything looks like it’s wrapped around a fishbowl.

Things have come a long way in five years, though. At the moment I have my eyes on the Hero Go Pro. It is a professional-quality HD camera. Here’s a sample of the kind of footage it captures:The only drawback is the lack of GPS logging. Maybe that will come on a future model.

Anyway, this isn’t a run-of-the-mill dashcam. It’s intended for people who get out and about – much like the Contour unit I was using previously. It isn’t cheap, and one of the accessories – which is also not cheap – is a suction cup mount which allows you to mount the camera on boats, cars, and so on. Most of the reviews for the mount are positive, but one of them isn’t. Look at this:

A first trial of my brand new GoPro hero 3 cam ended in a huge disappointment. I used the suction cup as specified in the description. During a flight it was mounted on the wingtip of a single engined aircraft which is a flat and smooth surface. I cleaned and dried the spot where I mounted the suction cup carefully before placing it, just to make sure that the suction cup was fastened correctly as recommended. After a 20 minutes flight with a speed of 110 Mph I looked on my IPhone to set the camera in the photo mode instead of the video mode. I was very enthusiast of what I saw at the display of my IPhone. Suddenly the contact with the camera was lost and I looked at the wing and saw that I lost my camera………unfortunately above the water. 🙁 I wonder if GoPro has a solution for this as the suction cup does not meet the specification as mentioned and I was not able to see one single picture or video of my new cam.

I couldn’t stop laughing when I read it. This character had spent several hundred quid on a professional quality video camera and suction mount, and then gone and stuck it on the end of the wing of an aeroplane! Over water!

It’s a bit like buying a Ferrari and then driving it on a stock car track. Or a white silk shirt, then creosoting the fence while you’re wearing it.

Rik Mayall Dies

09/06/2014

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Movies & TV, News

These days you don’t get people who you could genuinely class as comedy legends, but if you did, Rik Mayall would be up there. So, it was very, very sad to read of his sudden death earlier today at the relatively young age of just 56.

He first hit the big time in the 80s in the cult TV show, The Young Ones. That show was essential viewing to any teenager at the time – and to be honest, it still is on the frequent re-runs on UK Gold. He also had cameo roles in several Blackadder shows.

They don’t know what the cause of his death was yet, but it isn’t being treated as suspicious in any way. He had apparently been unwell since a quad-bike accident about 15 years ago.

RIP, Rik. You made us laugh.