Despatch: January 2012

This is an OLD, OLD article. All external links are dead.

The latest edition of Despatch is now available – you can view it as a PDF file here.

You have to work over half way through it this month to find anything of any real interest (unless you’re so out of touch that the first half is news to you).

The first article is another repeat of the bloody theory test questions story. Yet again, we get to hear about Mike Penning’s idiotic belief that rewording the actual test so it isn’t available verbatim in published form is going to bestow immortality and a cure for scrofula on the human race.

The second article is about motorbikes, and how the EU is going to limit access to more powerful ones by age and length of holding a licence (why don’t they bloody do the same with cars – then we really would have a story).

Then there is some total nonsense about the government cutting red tape. Never, in the field of human procrastination, has so much been written about so little. The changes are insignificant, at best.

There’s some useful advice about buying secondhand vehicles, and what to look out for to avoid being scammed.

Some bureaucracy – to replace that being lost by cutting red tape, no doubt – involving an “expert panel” on “drug driving” is to be established. Apparently these “experts” are needed to tell us whether driving under the influence of drugs is dangerous or not. They are also needed to advise on whether certain prescribed medicines or drug combinations are dangerous, particularly when mixed with alcohol.

As an encore, they are expected to tell us why putting your hand in a running Flymo is dangerous. Of course, Mike Penning is involved – see if you can see which of these he said, and which one I just made up:

Britain has some of the safest roads in the country, but we know how important it is to tackle the menace of drug driving.

Fire is hot, but we know how important it to tackle the menace of arson.

Tricky, eh?

And right at the end, two snippets I found quite interesting. Apparently, from February 1st, a new contractor – TMG CRB – will be handling criminal record checks. I found this interesting – and confusing – because nearly TWO YEARS ago I updated my CRB through this same contractor when my badge was up for renewal. I can’t see what’s changed.

The other one is about councils being allowed to charge utilities companies by the day for digging up main roads. This warrants a separate post.

Would You Pass The Theory Test… Again?

It was a good job I did a little digging to get the original source of this one. Haynes – the Questionsworkshop manual people – have issued a press release where they say a survey has shown that a third of all road users reckon they would fail their theory tests if they had to take it now.

Also, 20% cannot do basic car checks, like oil, battery, and brake fluid levels. They say that 7% admit to knowing “nothing” about car maintenance. Those over 55 are most confident at maintenance.

It doesn’t say anything about the differences between men and women, though I’m sure they have that information. So I’m sure that they’d have mentioned it if it showed that women were miles better than men at these checks.

But I digress. Haynes’ MD says:

We all remember cramming the Highway Code. The problem is we don’t remember much of the Code itself. But what’s really useful about Haynes’ new version is the extra, practical advice on looking after a car or bike and handling the paperwork – and all for the same price.

So, the survey is merely supporting publicity for Haynes’ new publication. However, the MD has a point – most people DO cram. They always have. They do it for ANY test. Nothing has changed.

What first caught my attention with this story, though, was the RAC’s version of it. According to them, drivers “fear” retaking the theory test (which is certainly not what is implied by the Haynes original). But the RAC has a completely different take on what the findings mean:

[The findings} support evidence which suggests people cram the Highway Code before sitting their theory test then forget all the information shortly after.

This is utter nonsense. I have yet to see this “evidence”, which appears to amount to something Mike Penning’s daughter said one day while she was learning to drive, and which has got him making all kinds of ridiculous assertions about the driving instruction industry. The RAC should know better than to perpetuate such rubbish.

The Haynes survey simply reveals that a third of people don’t think they’d pass the theory test now. That’s all. It does not reveal any “fear”, and it does not support any idiotic ideas that the theory test somehow influences RTAs to any significant extent.

Winter Tyres – 2012 Episode

The debate about winter tyres is hotting up again, as it does every year.

The amusing thing is that everyone pontificating about them seems to forget the extremely mild wChestnuteather we’ve had all winter, and the fact that winter tyres really only have benefits that outweigh any drawbacks below 7°C. So between October (the date all the experts reckon they should go on) last year and now, there have been approximately 7 days during which they may technically have been an advantage, and only ONE day so far where they would definitely have been so.

Even today the temperature has been up at around 5°C, in spite of all that snow last night.

The other thing I’m hearing now is that apparently, anyone who doesn’t have winter tyres fitted is a danger on the roads! This is just another attempt to bolster an argument which doesn’t really have a right and a wrong side in this country. But driving instructors are very monochromatic when it comes to their beliefs.

Ask an ADI a question, and he can only answer based on his own experiences – but he will consider those experiences to be fact, and will be unable to grasp the fact that others have totally different experiences, all of which add together to make an overall picture.

So, I guess that all those 4x4s, top marque cars, and “experts” that insist on overtaking at a greater speed, cutting in, and giving their winter tyres a good old work out in poor driving conditions are something we should all be grateful for. That’s what’s being implied.

The fact of the matter is that without years of driving experience on snow and using winter tyres – something none of these “experts” has – there is one thing they are all completely oblivious, yet completely beholden, to. What?

A false sense of security.

And that puts everyone on the roads – whether they’ve got winter tyres or not – at risk.

You don’t have to have winter tyres. In some cases, in some areas, at some times, some people might benefit from them. But that doesn’t mean everyone will.

However, like I said. The fact that others have alternative experiences? A very difficult concept for many of these people.

DSA Alert: Bad Weather And Driving Tests

Not surprisingly. the DSA is warning people that driving tests can be abandoned or cancelled due to the bad weather.

Woods - BlizzardIt provides links to this information page and this video on YouTube.

Just like the last time it snowed, I’m getting a lot of hits from people who just can’t seem to grasp the concept of there being a point beyond which driving tests do not go ahead (not to mention ADIs unable to accept that the DSA makes the decision, not them).

I have a pupil with a test booked for tomorrow morning (she’s already called me to ask if it is likely to go ahead). As soon as I get up, I will phone the test centre to ask if it is. I’ve already arranged to do a “snow lesson” with her if it is cancelled.

The worst that can happen is that the DSA will ask me to call back an hour beforehand, but when the weather is THIS bad I doubt they’ll do that. They’ve always made advance decisions for me before.

Whether the test goes ahead or not is a simple YES/NO situation, decided by the DSA.

Will my driving test be cancelled due to snow?

Quite possibly. And with the amount we’ve had, almost certainly until some of it thaws. You need to phone up the test centre on the day using the number on your appointment email confirmation and check. Otherwise, you MUST turn up – even if they cancel it at the last minute. If you don’t, you’ll lose your test fee.

My MONDAY (6th Feb) morning test IS cancelled. I’m not surprised, and I fully accept the DSA’s decision. My TUESDAY (7th Feb) late morning test is also cancelled.

Are driving tests cancelled today?

It staggers me that every time we get a bit of bad weather, I get loads of hits based on this search term.

Will snow stop a driving test?

Look, for crying out loud. How many more times do you need telling this. YES. Snow can easily stop a test. They tell you that when you book it.

Do driving lessons get cancelled when there is snow?

Yes… but not always – it depends on how much snow and how you are as a driver. Your instructor will decide. You won’t get charged for it – if you do, find another instructor quickly.

Driving tests cancelled due to snow 2012

It doesn’t matter if it’s 1812, 1912, 2012, or any other date. They will cancel your test if there is snow on the ground and it is icy.

Will the DSA cancel for other bad-weather reasons?

If it is icy they will cancel. Although it has never happened to me, I also suspect that several feet of floodwater on the test routes would be a sufficient reason, too. Any situation which is dangerous could lead to tests being cancelled, though in my experience it is only ice and snow that triggers this.

Look: CALL THE TEST CENTRE. ONLY THEY CAN TELL YOU.

Bloody Snow!

Mind you, following on from that last post, we’ve had about 4-6 inches of snow now. It seems to have stopped, but the forecast is for it to freeze (it was 0°C while it was coming down, anyway).

I have a new pupil booked tomorrow morning, and I was thinking towards the end of my last lesson tonight it wouldn’t be a good idea to go out Snowflake from Graphicsoftonce I realised how bad the snow fall was. She contacted me first, and we’ve postponed.

I’ve got another pupil tomorrow who has had quite a few lessons so far, but he is one of those people who is like a coiled snake on lessons – ready to strike out in any direction at any time at the slightest thing. I’ll see how it goes, but I can see that one having to be shelved. Too risky.

Then on Monday, another pupil has a test scheduled. Unless we have the Mother Of All Thaws tomorrow, the chances of that going ahead are very slim. My HTC phone weather app reckons it will be around freezing (or miles below) overnight all week, and although past experience of that means it could be as high as 20°C, I think it might be quite close this time.

As I’ve said before, I used to love the snow (I still do in some respects). But it’s already costing me. I do lessons when it’s safe to do so – but sometimes it just isn’t.

Will my driving lessons be cancelled due to snow?

It depends on how much snow there is, how far advanced you are with your training, and your instructor’s attitude to teaching in snow. There is no rule that says you mustn’t have lessons in snow. In fact, it makes sense to do them so you can get valuable experience. But beginners shouldn’t do it, because it’s just too dangerous.

Also remember that what YOU see as being “advanced” in your training, your instructor might not agree with. It’s his or her decision.

Will my driving test be cancelled due to snow?

Quite possibly. And with the amount we’ve had, almost certainly until some of it thaws. You need to phone up the test centre on the day using the number on your appointment email confirmation and check. Otherwise, you MUST turn up – even if they cancel it at the last minute. If you don’t, you’ll lose your test fee.

The Perfect Lesson

Well, the snow they forecast arrived mid-afternoon. I had a lesson booked at 7pm, and after considering the conditions and the pupil’s ability I decided to go ahead with it and use it as a “snow lesson”.

It’s incredible when you do a lesson that goes so well, and which you know is going to be useful for the rest of their lives.

First of all, moving away on his road, I got him to stop and witness how easy it is to skid. I made sure that he understood that in snow (and on ice), slight skids and wheel spins are almost inevitable – but the important thing is not to let them overlap with other traffic or hazards.

So we dealt with speed and planning ahead – particularly anticipating lights, bends, other traffic, and anything else which would require us to slow down or stop. Using the gears to slow the car down gradually, rather than braking, was especially important.

He was amazed driving through Colwick on the Loop Road (as was I) that some prick decided to overtake us and the three cars we were following – at speed (maybe he had a nail in his tyre) – on about an inch of lying snow, pulling in sharply in front of us at one point to avoid colliding head on with a car coming the opposite way. I wish I’d got his number or caught up with him at the lights, but he was going too fast.

He realised the importance of planning ahead and anticipation when going uphill towards lights, and trying to keep the car moving to try to avoid the problems of moving off on ice on slopes. I wasn’t so lucky going up a slope in Clifton later, when some prat coming downhill with parked cars on their side decided to apply the Clifton Gene (it only has one helix in it), and barge through. I had to stop, then was unable to move off again and had to turn around.

Travelling through Bingham, we were tailgated extremely closely by a Nissan Navarro (reg. no. AY08 FPG) as we were doing 30mph on a Nissan Navarro Pratmobile - AY08 FPG40mph road on snow which was, by now, quite deep. If we’d stopped, he wouldn’t have. As soon as we got on to the new roundabout down there, he overtook at speed and flew off down the A52 towards Nottingham, I think – he was going so fast, he was gone by the time we got round there. Mind you, I lost count of the number of Audis that overtook me as I was going to pick the pupil up.

All in all, though, a great lesson. We covered all the snowy stuff, and he handled it brilliantly. I just wish all pupils could have a lesson in snow – that way, maybe fewer of them would end up driving like those other idiots out there.

Between lessons this afternoon, the Traffic News just went nuts – there were multi-car pile-ups on just about every motorway the moment snow started to fall. So when my pupil said “how do they get away with it?”, the answer was: “eventually, they don’t!”

Common questions:

Will my driving lessons be cancelled due to snow?

It depends on how much snow there is, how far advanced you are with your training, and your instructor’s attitude to teaching in snow. There is no rule that says you mustn’t have lessons in snow. In fact, it makes sense to do them so you can get valuable experience. But beginners shouldn’t do it, because it’s just too dangerous.

Also remember that what YOU see as being “advanced” in your training, your instructor might not agree with. It’s his or her decision.

Will my driving test be cancelled due to snow?

Quite possibly. And with the amount we’ve had, almost certainly until some of it thaws. You need to phone up the test centre on the day using the number on your appointment email confirmation and check. Otherwise, you MUST turn up – even if they cancel it at the last minute. If you don’t, you’ll lose your test fee.

Prospective Bus Drivers Fall At First Hurdle

National Express West Midlands took on 420 drivers last year, out of 4,500 applicants. It National Express West Midlands Buseshas a further 170 vacancies – and yet it can’t fill them, even though there are so many people looking for work. Why?

It has the admirable recruitment criterion that applicants must not have ANY points on their licences.

According to the story, the industry “standard” (I think they used that word to try and suggest it is National Express who is in the wrong) is 3 points for those seeking to become drivers.

National Express throws out the application without further ado if the applicant has ANY points. It also requires candidates to take literacy and numeracy tests.

National Express West Midlands spokesman Jack Kelly said: “We are committed to developing opportunities for people in the West Midlands through Jobcentre Plus.

“As well as having a rigorous test people have to have a clean driving licence.”

Good for them. Let’s hope they aren’t forced to back down – the article also cites the case of London bus company, Abellio, who went to Poland to find drivers because they couldn’t get suitable applicants “among Britain’s 2.5 million unemployed” (again, implying that Abellio is at fault).

This is what happens when you dumb down education and don’t punish people who break the law. Eventually, being stupid becomes commonplace. I guess we’re seeing that now.

But I must confess I am seeing National Express in a much more positive light knowing that they have such high recruitment standards.

Unbelievable Nonsense

I noticed on a forum someone was asking about what would likely happen to a test if the examiner spotted damage to the sidewall of a tyre before setting out.

On the UK mainland, quite simply, a tyre:

…should have no less than 1.6mm of tread across the central ¾ breadth all the way around, and it should not have any cuts or bulges in the sidewalls.

That’s the official specification. It stops short of advising you what to do when you have an Nail in tyreiron spike or ice pick sticking in your tyre. I guess they assume that common sense dictates you get the problem sorted.

If your tyres don’t meet this specification then the examiner is quite within his rights to cancel the test. The car is simply not safe.

And if he spots the fault, he WILL cancel it.

So it is absolutely unbelievable to read someone state that it is safe to drive on a tyre with a nail in it for 50 minutes – even “at speed” – because it won’t lose air, and a test shouldn’t be “lost” because of it.

Almost as unbelievable is the statement from the same person that Kwik Fit will always tell you you need a new tyre and won’t fix punctures.

That is more complete rubbish. Some branches might do that – which is a risk at ANY tyre shop – but Kwik Fit around my way are happy to fix punctures, and at least one other person on that same forum has said the same. My tyres are covered as part of my lease arrangement, and so I’d prefer a new tyre if I get a flat – but Kwik Fit have more than once opted to repair it.

It’s hard to believe sometimes that such dangerously misguided or even libellous advice can come from driving instructors.

If you have a nail in your tyre then you must get it fixed. Driving at full speed knowing you have one in there is insane, and it’s arguable whether you should be let out alone – never mind be allowed to teach people to drive – if you choose to do so.

For the record, a nail (or any other foreign object) stuck in your tyre is non-standard. It could move and cause the tyre to deflate at any time, and you have no control over whether or when that will happen. At speed, the damage it might have already done to the tyre’s structure – and about which you can only guess – could result in a catastrophic blow-out.

To suggest that it is safe to drive for ANY distance, let alone “at speed”, with such a tyre is too stupid for words.

Better Service For Motorists At Garages

MOT SignAn email alert from the DSA says that motorists are to see improvements in customer service at local garages.

It must be stressed that the DSA is merely reporting on “a package of transparency and value-for-money measures” from the government.

The “transparency” aspect appears to be some heavy obfuscation of that story from quite a while ago about changing the MOT frequency (which they’re NOT now going to change, thank God, because it was a stupid idea).

If you read the release, you’ll have a hell of a job seeing anything to do with the MOT that will improve your “customer service” index next time you go in. No price cuts, nothing.

But there’s plenty to keep myriad government officials occupied for the foreseeable future – with the distinct possibility of a price hike if all they’re proposing ever gets implemented.