Category - News

Is it a Clock? Or is it a Bomb?

The Americans aren’t very good at this sort of thing. The story of Ahmed Mohamed, a 14-year old pupil at MacArthur High School, has been all over the media the last few days, but I particularly like this write-up from BGR which proves that some Americans at least have got it together.Clockwork

Ahmed brought a homemade clock into school to show off his technical skills to his teachers. One of them decided it was a bomb and called in the police. Ahmed was then questioned by four of them, handcuffed, and taken to a juvenile detention centre. At no point did he say it was anything other than a clock. Conversely, at no point did the police consider that it was anything other than a bomb.

“We have no information that he claimed it was a bomb,” one of the cops told The Dallas Morning News. “He kept maintaining it was a clock, but there was no broader explanation.”

Texas police don’t appear to be all that bright, because like many of their kind they insist on trying to use big words when interviewed. They really shouldn’t. If it was a clock, what possible “broader explanation” could Ahmed give?

At the time of the original story, the police were still thinking of charging Ahmed with making a “hoax bomb”. Remember that he never claimed it was a bomb, and he maintained throughout that it was a clock, so quite how this “hoax bomb” fits in is anyone’s guess. The Texas police trying to save face, I would guess.

I don’t want to seem to be paraphrasing the BGR article, but they’ve done such a good write up, and it’s pretty much what I’d have written if I’d got there first. For that reason, I apologise for also mentioning that Ahmed is Muslim, although as BGR’s follow up article notes, he is a native Texan (by which I assume they mean he was born there).Ahmed Mohamed's home made clock

Mind you, when you look at the picture of Ahmed’s clock – which you initially assume to be mechanical (well, I did), but which turns out to be digital – you can see how lesser intellects might become alarmed. It’s about the size of a small briefcase. On the other hand, it clearly operates from the mains and it has a huge display. Of course, it also has no explosives in it.

It’s a sad indictment of the times we live in that such distrust exists. This extends to the support that has been created for Ahmed by his sisters, as mentioned in the Dallas Morning News.

Is it only me who thinks that the hash tag @IStandWithAhmed could be considered inflammatory? You know, with the unfortunate combination of the letters “I” and “S”? Yes, very sad times.

In a nutshell, Texas police could easily have realised early on that it was a false alarm. But for whatever reason, they didn’t. In the meantime, Ahmed has got an invite to the White House to meet President Obama.

Corbyn Has Probably Already Lost 2020

I have always been a Labour voter – by which, I mean that there is no one else I would ever vote for. However, there is still no guarantee I would always actually vote Labour if I disagreed with their policies. I’d just not bother – like I did (or rather, didn’t) between about 1980 and the late 1990s. Voting options

I almost didn’t vote again in the last election This was as a direct result of the incompetence of a certain Portfolio Holder for Housing and Planning (a Labour councillor) over the tram, road works, and 20mph speed limits in Nottingham. I was concerned that by supporting Labour on a national level I would be supporting this woman at the local level.

It’s worth pointing out that people like me don’t win elections for political parties. That responsibility lies with the floating voters – people who change the way they vote based on the phases of the moon,  which way the wind is blowing, or some minor event in their lives which occurred shortly before they needed to make their political choice. There’s nothing I hate more than to hear the statement “I’m voting [insert name] because it’s time we had a change”. But like it or not, these people make up the majority of the electorate, and they therefore collectively hold the cards which decide the outcome of any election.

And Jeremy Corbyn has managed – singlehandedly, and in less than a week since he was elected leader of the Party – to ensure that almost none of these floaters will vote Labour in the 2020 election. He did this by not singing the National Anthem at a Battle of Britain memorial service.

Corbyn is a man who went to work for trade unions almost immediately after leaving school in the late 60s. He was elected on to Haringey Council (synonymous with the “loony left” tag throughout the late 70s, 80s, and 90s) in 1974. He supports unilateral nuclear disarmament, and:

…is a member of the Socialist Campaign Group, the Palestine Solidarity Campaign, Amnesty International and the Campaign for Nuclear Disarmament, and is the National Chair of the Stop the War Coalition.

(Source: Wikipedia)

In short, his politics (not him as a person) were part of the reason I stopped voting. I started again when it became clear that Tony Blair, and Gordon Brown and Ed Milliband after him, had realised that extreme left wing views were never going to win over the voters moving into the 21st Century. Such leftist ideas might have positively influenced elections 80 years ago, when most of the downtrodden voting population worked underground, but since the late 70s left wing fanaticism has become steadily more risible. These days. it is as distasteful as the stuff dogs leave behind, and which you have to scrape off your shoes.Ed Milliband and the bacon sandwich

You could argue that Ed Milliband lost the last general election (only just, I might add) because of a bacon sandwich. More specifically, it was because the likes of The Sun and The Daily Mail ran the photo – and other distasteful material – on an almost daily basis for the entire duration of their election coverage.This is how the right-wing tabloid press operates.

The point is that you can be absolutely sure that come 2020, The Sun and The Mail will be at it again. The problem for Labour this time, though, will be that whereas Ed Milliband didn’t have many skeletons in the closet – and they had to make do with the unfortunate sandwich – Jeremy Corbyn has got a truck load of the things as far as stirring up the emotions of the floating voter goes. The National Anthem affair is the cherry on top, which will appeal to the emotions of the vast majority of floaters. And that’s assuming that Corbyn isn’t clumsy enough to add to his portfolio in the next four years.

Up A Gumtree (Darwin Award Candidate)

Take a look at this half-witted thug. His name is Darnell Miller, of Stockhill Circus in Basford.Darnell Miller - a criminal dullard

He’s now the current front-runner for the 2015 Darwin Awards as a result of his less-than-perfect criminal master plan.

So how did it work? Well, he appears to have been just smart enough to be able to open up the Gumtree website in his browser. Once there, he saw the pretty pictures of mobile phones people were selling and agreed to meet them with the idea of purchasing the phones. Once he had his hands on the merchandise – and this is the clever part (to him, anyway) – he ran away like the snivelling coward he was.

His intelligence ran out at that point. You see, every one of his victims was able to give an absolutely perfect description of him. Furthermore, the master plan had the obvious flaw in it that after the first time you executed it, the chances of further success became progressively lower as word got around. Miller was simply too stupid to realise this.

The thing is, his life was already in the gutter for him to have even tried this in the first place. Now that he has a 5-year prison stretch to deal with, the gutter is going to seem luxurious compared to where he is likely to end up.

How Evil Can People Get?

Many people will already be aware of this story. Michelle Carter, 18, is on trial in America for allegedly encouraging her boyfriend to commit suicide.Michelle Carter

Conrad Roy was also 18, and he had mental health problems. I won’t copy the text here, but you can read the text message exchanges between him and Carter in The Sun’s version of the story.

The message carried by these texts is crystal clear, and it only leaves you wondering how someone could be so evil, and at the same time so dumb as to document that evil so clearly.

But this is America we’re talking about, and the situation isn’t anywhere near as clear cut as you might think.

Carter is charged with involuntary manslaughter, which carries a 20 year jail term. However, Massachusetts (where all this happened) is one of a handful of American states where assisted suicide is not illegal, and that is where her lawyers are hovering. They argue that Conrad wanted to kill himself and she merely “assisted”. You only have to read those texts she sent to see just how much “assistance” she gave him.

Carter may have sent a few texts too many, though. Several months after the Conrad’s death, she sent a message to a friend which said:

Like, honestly I could have stopped it. I was the one on the phone with him and he got out of the car because [the carbon monoxide] was working and he got scared. I f***ing told him to get back in.

She also texted to a friend:

[If the police] read my messages with him I’m done. His family will hate me and I can go to jail.

When you read the full transcript of texts between her and Conrad, you can really come to only one conclusion – and that would hold, whatever the technical outcome of the trial.

Driving Test Shake Up Planned by Government

This article in the Independent makes interesting reading. It reports that the Government is planning a shake up of the driving regulations – the “biggest since 1935”, if you believe the hype.

There is talk of partly privatising the driving test itself, closing test centres, and increasing the age of self-certification from 70 to 75 years. The article states:

Ministers want to improve the driving test pass rate, which is languishing below 50 per cent. The document states that there is “anecdotal evidence” that ill-prepared learners are booking their test date after only a handful of lessons, possibly because of concerns over waiting times between booking and taking the practical examination.

This is complete bollocks. The pass rate has gone up every year since 2002, and 47% is hardly “languishing” below 50. And waiting times have only gone up over the last year, so God only knows where this “anecdotal evidence” has come from. Here are the historical pass rates:

2002/3

2003/4

2004/5

2005/6

2006/7

2007/8

2008/9

2009/10

2010/11

2011/12

2012/13

2013/14

2014/15

43.2

42.8

14.9

42.6

43.3

44.2

45.3

45.9

46.3

46.9

47.1

47.1

46.9

I couldn’t find any data from before 2002, and that figure from 2004/5 has to be an error, but here’s what the data look like (without 2004/5) when plotted on a graph:Historical Pass Rates since 2002

It’s bad enough that the Independent hacks didn’t research it properly, but I really do wish that those people cutting-and-pasting it on to forums would do their homework first. The situation is not as the Government (or the Independent) is reporting it, and that makes it invalid as the justification for change. The Government is merely pursuing an agenda – more on that in a moment.

The driving test pass rate has always “languished” below 100% for the simple reason that not everyone passes the test! The reason they don’t pass is because there is effectively a “pass mark” – dictated by the driver fault/serious fault boundary – which quite simply means that if they don’t drive well enough on the day then they will fail. It’s nature in action, and it results in a national pass rate of around 47% at the moment. You wouldn’t expect it to change much year on year unless someone was fiddling the results.

But that’s what the Government is proposing. One of the ways they will do it is already being trialled, and the actual changes being looked at include replacing most of the existing manoeuvres (which people can currently easily fail at) with ones that only a complete idiot could fail at. I mean, they are looking to replace the turn in the road and reverse round a corner manoeuvres with “pulling over on the right” and “reversing”!

To get an idea of what the Government is trying to do, you only have to look at the GCSE grading system. GCSEs are graded A to G and – like it or not – every one of those grades is officially considered to be a “pass”. It means that the “pass rate” for GCSEs has been above 97% since 1989, and every year you have people walking around with Es, Fs, and Gs pretending – having been led to believe – that they have a “pass”, when the reality is that no employer (or university) in the land is going to be demanding a handful of Gs in order to be considered for a position with them. The only grades that mean anything are the As, Bs, and Cs, and that brings the “pass rate” down to around 60%. Consider also that under the old O Level system, I believe that around 40% of candidates achieved an A-C grade (anything below that was NOT a pass), and you can see how the figures have been artificially elevated – don’t get me started on how GCSEs are far easier than ‘O’ Levels were.

But this is what they are proposing to do with the driving test. They want to make it so easy only a complete moron would ever fail it, and this will bring the “pass rate” up. What they blatantly fail to realise is that the higher pass rate will bear no relation to actual driving standards. In fact, it will mask a serious decline, as candidates will not be required to master more difficult skills and will only be asked to demonstrate much easier ones. Yet these people will be sent out on the roads with full driving licences.

There is mention in the Independent article of “the private sector [being] asked to help to fill any shortages of examiners and test centres.” I can’t get as worked up over this as some ADIs seem to be doing. It doesn’t specify who the “private sector” are, and it’s only the usual bunch of anti-DVSA instructors who are assuming that it means random people taken off the streets.

Another change that looks like it is going to happen anyway is that people will no longer have to declare themselves fit to drive when they reach 70. The age limit will be raised to 75. This is frightening.

Despatch Goes Blog

For some years, DVSA used to send out a periodical magazine called Despatch. I seem to recall that it was originally a paper magazine, then it went online as an 3-monthly e-zine with a much reduced (and ever-decreasing) content. The last time they published it was July 2013. Until I looked that up I had no idea it had been so long.Welcome to Despatch

Anyway, an email alert from DVSA reports that Despatch is back in blog form.You can access it here.

I used to enjoy reading Despatch, though I have to say that towards the end it didn’t actually have much in it, and the news was always out of date because DVSA had sent out email alerts during the previous 3 months. I’m not sure how it will turn out now, but theoretically it can be 100% up-to-date.

One thing I’m not sure DVSA has thought through properly is the comments. At the moment there are only two stories – and three comments, in which you can already sense “an edge”. Once the real gutter trash gets wind of it… well, let’s wait and see.


Aaaaand there it goes! Just 24 hours later and we have plenty more comments – most of them from instructors centred on complaining about waiting times (even though the topic they’re commenting on is actually about how DVSA wants to address that), and “unfair” examiners.

A member of the public writes:

Georgina Covell — 18/08/2015

I agree they need the right people but this isn’t helping my son who needs his licence by the end of the month for a job application to progress

You have to wonder at the mentality of some people. You really do.

I wonder how long before DVSA makes their blog read-only? Negative comments like these detract from it’s usefulness.

It’s Official: The Police Are Now Recruiting Morons

Maybe I’m missing something, and the title of this article is therefore wrong, but I saw this article on the BBC website just now. It would appear that Leicestershire Police have been “trialling” a scheme whereby they have not fully investigated burglaries involving properties with odd-numbered addresses.

Just think about that. Now that the burglars know, they can target all the odd-numbers – or in other words, they can burgle one side of the street with little fear of being caught (most burglars get away with it anyway, so this pretty much guarantees them a free hand as long as they stick to the odd-numbered houses).

Leicestershire Police think it’s a great idea:

…[they] said the pilot scheme had had no adverse effect on public satisfaction or crime rates.

Can you believe that Leicestershire Police could really be so absolutely and pathetically stupid as to come out with a comment like this?

Trust me: now that the public knows, “public satisfaction” will (and should) nosedive into the ground – particularly among those burglary victims living in odd-numbered houses. As for crime rates not increasing, well it just shows what a pathetically low solution rates they must be working to if they can afford to ignore half of the cases.

The Police seem to have lost the plot completely. The article adds:

Results of the three-month trial are being evaluated and could see it rolled out throughout the East Midlands.

So. If someone can please explain to me what it is I’m missing here I’d be most grateful. I mean, are they really telling burglars that they won’t properly investigate odd-numbered house raids?

Lottery Winner Once on Skid Row?

I notice that a local ex-footballer has just won the lottery jackpot. Terry Bradbury has won a cool £5.5m. Good luck to the guy, who is now in his 70s – he has as much right to win as anyone else.Lottery Logo

The BBC, though, managed to dumb things down by declaring:

A former Chelsea midfielder – who made £25 a week as a professional footballer in the 1950s – has scooped a £5.5m Lotto jackpot.

Someone at the Beeb needs a lesson in maths and history if they’re going to imply things that are simply incorrect. Someone earning £25 a week in 1955 is not the same as someone earning £25 a week in 2015. That £25 would have bought as much then as around £600 does now, so Mr Bradbury was on a wage equivalent to more than £35,000 per annum. Admittedly, this is nothing like what modern footballers get, but it’s well above the average UK household 2015 income of £26,500.

But as I said at the start, good luck to him – he is as deserving as anyone else who wins the lottery.

Dumb it Down a Little… And Now a Little More

I sometimes find it difficult to comprehend the mentalities of people I share this planet with. This story on the BBC does little to change that.Emojis - designed by idiots, for idiots

It seems that some British firm has come up with a system whereby your PIN code(s) – that you use for your bank, etc. – can be set using emojis.

For anyone who doesn’t know, an emoji can simultaneously be any or all of the following:

  • a simple icon used to convey several words at once
  • a confusing icon of incomprehensible meaning outside Japan (and probably, even inside)
  • a way of extracting money from people who aren’t good with words, but who still have a smartphone

Quite frankly, anyone who uses emojis is not likely to be old enough to have a bank account (or if they do, they shouldn’t have). It’s bad enough when people intersperse forum posts or text messages with “lol” as a substitute for a full stop, or insist on typing “u” instead of “you”. At best, it’s just lazy. At its worst, it’s pathetic. But emoticons – or emojis, as they have evolved into – are a hundred times worse.Emoticon vs emoji

No one with a mental age above 15 is going to use them. They have their roots in Japanese culture anyway, and as you can see from the brief selection in the image at the top of this article, they are pretty much meaningless if you’re not a Japanese school kid. But even then, who the hell is going to need to use a small picture of a mouse or a puppy in anything other than the most pointless of communications? And what’s the difference between a yellow heart and red one? Jaundice, maybe? Yet people actually pay money for these damned things, even though in a more basically drawn form they’re already part of the Unicode standard (and that’s free).

Laughably, Androidcentral says:

With emoji, users could communicate using few or little words and still have their passion come through. One such example would be the “Reversed Hand with Middle Finger Extended” emoji that allows you to quickly express your emotion without having to say much.

Like I suggested above, anyone who needs to say that very often has a restricted mental age.

Anyway, the “service” being touted in that original article has 44 symbols, and it reckons that that’s better than just the 10 numbers used for bank PINs. Your first thought is why they couldn’t use the letters of the alphabet and punctuation marks as well as the numeric characters, but this is where the dumbing down comes in:

David Webber, managing director of Intelligent Environments, said the system was designed to appeal to 15-25-year-olds.

“Why can’t financial service be fun and innovative?” he said.

The truth of the matter is that said 15-25 year olds really should be encouraged to learn to communicate properly, because once they get to 26+ pathetic cutesy icons aren’t going to cut it any more.

Mind you, the frightening thing is that with companies like Intelligent Environments around, maybe in 10 years’ time we’ll be living in a techno village of the damned, where people can only communicate like this. God help us.


As a footnote to this, the day after I updated it I was in contact with a pupil who has a her test coming up. She wanted an extra lesson somewhere, but my diary was full. However, I got a cancellation on the morning of her test and asked her if she wanted it. After confirming she did, and after me querying her choice of time and the fact she has the attention span of a gnat, she sent me this text message:Text message from a pupil

I can’t work out if the emoji adds any value to the text or not.

14-Year Old Thug Stabs Teacher

Most people will have seen the news this week, where a supply teacher in Bradford was stabbed by a 14-year old thug.

Well, the little animal who did it was in court today and he’s obviously been remanded in custody. In fact, the minutes leading up to the stabbing were most likely the last he will ever see from the outside of a prison – certainly if there is any justice in this world. People like him are soulless and are best kept away from society permanently. Quite frankly, the same goes for whoever dares to claim responsibility for bringing the little dickhead up to be like this in the first place (and any siblings who share his, shall we say, “radical” views).

What was amusing (if you can find any sort of humour in something like this) was that he cannot be named “for legal reasons”.

Someone should tell that to The Sun. They have a front page and a double spread with photos of the thug as he was being arrested. They have printed everything they can about him, including his name and probably – if I look closely enough – his inside leg measurement. There’s enough information to carry out identity theft!

The problem is that their actions could easily be used by the little scumbag’s defence team as having prejudiced the case, making prosecution either more difficult or more costly (perhaps both).