Well done to Martin, who passed first time with just 3 driver faults. This meant a lot to him for his job, and for his future family status, as he and his wife are thinking of children. After all, someone has got to be able to take them to dance class or football training!
Another one who has been a pleasure to teach, and another natural driver.
I forgot to post this one, but well done to Andrew who passed at the end of July first time with 8 driver faults. It was important to him as he will now be able to look for a better job (and get to the one he currently has)… if his mum will let him borrow her car!
He’s been another one who has been a pleasure to teach. I seem to have been lucky with that lately. It was also nice to get someone who is a natural driver – and I’ve been very unlucky with that this year.
April Fools’ Day has come early this year. Fuji Xerox has apparently created a printer that can…
…move around a lounge or office to bring documents to the person who printed them.
It has to be absolutely the most pointless invention ever. Even when you consider that it is intended to improve security by going to the person printing the document, it still ranks as the most guaranteed failure ever. Fortunately, it is confined to Japan. I’d be surprised that even the Japanese take to it, but it has no chance anywhere else.
It reminded me of an episode of The Simpsons (back when The Simpsons was actually funny, and not now, where people just pretend it is), where Homer invents an electric hammer.
I’m just trying to imagine someone taking such a device on to the Dragons’ Den to try and get funding. They’d be laughed out of the room. One of the dragons recently complained that people invent things just for the sake of inventing them. This is right up there.
Regular readers will know that I enjoy going to live music gigs. One of the best smaller venues is Nottingham’s Rock City, which in the past has hosted the likes of David Bowie, Nirvana, U2, REM, Ozzy Osbourne, Oasis, and Blur. I’ve seen Gary Moore there a couple of times, along with The Darkness, Haim, Courtney Love, Steel Panther, Hawkwind, Black Star Riders, and Primal Scream. At the attached Rescue Rooms I’ve seen John Otway and Wild Willy Barrett, Evarose, CJD, and Mostly Autumn. There have been a few others.
A story came in on the newsfeeds about a club in Manchester – several around the country, in fact – which might face losing its licence because of complaints by people living in nearby flats about the noise. When I did a bit of searching, I found that Rock City had had the same problem back in 2004, where it was forced to spend £250,000 on new soundproofing because people who had moved in nearby had started whingeing about “the noise”.
The club had already opposed planning permission for the flats on the grounds that they were too close and were bound to be affected by noise, but since Nottingham City Council is run by money-grabbing idiots of the first order the flats were built, people who were too stupid to guess what might happen moved in, and… well, Rock City had to spend a quarter of a million on a new roof after the complaints started. At the time all this happened, Nottingham City Council “declined” to speak with the BBC.
Night & Day in Manchester is now going through the same unfortunate experience. Their plight is somewhat worse than the one Rock City went through, as the flats are in the building next door and adjoin the venue. Furthermore, although the venue is a successful business, it appears to be smaller than Rock City and probably couldn’t afford to shell out the money needed (scaled up to 2014 prices, and given the extreme proximity of the complainants) to address the problem.
Night & Day argue that it is not fair that someone can move next to a venue that has been open for 23 years and potentially bring about its closure.
And they’re right. Manchester City Council is likely to revoke their licence, having decided that there IS a noise nuisance.
“We’ve done what we do for over 20 years and nothing has changed,” the venue’s promoter Gareth Butterworth insists.
“There’s no new system. Nothing has been turned up or turned down. Why would we? Music too loud doesn’t sound good anyway.
“If a person wants to live in the city centre, there are things that go with that and noise is one of them.
“Venues are suffering up and down the country. Most of them are small businesses and they don’t really have the finances to fight this kind of thing, and they end up losing their business.”
Councils up and down the country are run by idiots. That’s the real problem. They insist on building “premium” accommodation in central locations where there is automatically going to be an issue with something or other. And the clowns who buy these properties really should do their homework, because you don’t need a degree to work out that you aren’t going to get a quiet life if you move in next to a bloody nightclub.
Delving into it further, it seems that the flats weren’t built properly – probably to save money – and the issue of noise transference is connected with inadequate soundproofing in those.
The story also reports other problems around the country. The Boileroom in Guildford is subject to a hearing in September. The Fleece in Bristol, which has been in existence for 32 years, opposed the conversion of an office block into flats because it was worried about a “deluge of complaints” (although Bristol Council appears to have addressed this with demands for soundproofing measures – even though the people who move in will probably still complain). The Blind Tiger and Freebutt in Brighton and the 200 Club in Newport, Gwent have already closed because of noise issues, and Le Pub – also in Newport – is trying to raise £10,000 for a new soundproofed roof after being issued a noise abatement warning.
The Music Venue Trust has been set up to lobby for a change in the law.
The Music Venue Trust wants the UK to adopt the “agent of change principle”, whereby the person responsible for a change in the circumstances must deal with the consequences.
So if someone builds a block of flats next to a venue that is not otherwise causing a nuisance, it will be down to the developer to pay for soundproofing. If a club turns the volume up, it is their problem.
This makes perfect sense. And I would add that the local council should also be included in that, inasmuch as if they’re stupid and greedy enough to grant planning permission for these locations, then they should be held partly responsible for any problems – prospectively or retrospectively – experienced by existing businesses..
Not so much a “two pinter”, as a kegmeister this time. Nicholas Ward, 47, was found to be three and a half times over the limit after he had crashed his car. Ward, a consultant doctor, was avoiding police and refusing medical treatment in an attempt to escape detection.
Ward was banned for nearly three years, fined £1,000, and given 200 hours of community service. Frighteningly:
Michael Oerton, defending, said Ward had ‘self imposed’ a disqualification on himself since the collision and now cycled to work.
He said the collision was a ‘wake up call’ and he had now sought medical help for his alcohol problems.
Let’s hope this “help” ensures he doesn’t ride his bicycle whilst put of his skull on booze. After all, not having to worry about losing your licence anymore does open up possibilities for a few extra snifters now and then, doesn’t it? Cyclists already manage to go under the radar on this and many other matters which motorists don’t.
They come in groups. This story tells how another drink-driver blew a relatively low reading of 56mg when stopped by police. However, his “couple of pints” prompted him to drive at 110mph in heavy rain, past a police car, in a high performance vehicle (the make isn’t specified).
Rhys Fisher, 26, Is (or, most likely, was) an estate agent. He was put in prison for 5 months, banned for three years, fined £500, and ordered to take an extended test when his ban finishes.
John Dowlman, defending, said Fisher had no previous convictions and on the night of the offence had been out for dinner.
Mr Dowlman said: “He has messed up and he accepts it is his own fault. He struggles to understand why he did it.”
Actually, understanding why he did it is easy. He was already an idiot who thought that a couple of drinks would be “all right”, and drinking had simply amplified these qualities.
An interesting story from Cumbria. Rory George Amos had only drunk “a couple of pints”, but he registered 53mg of alcohol in a breath test, against the legal limit of 35mg.
He was drink-driving, it’s as simple as that. But comments from the defence lawyer, John Cooper, are worth mentioning:
“It still seems to be a common belief that if you drink only two pints you will be okay.”
He went on to say that the sooner people know and realise this is not the case, the better.
If you’re going to drive, you shouldn’t drink. The old story about two pints being safe only applies to the average male, and it assumes that the beer is 3.5% ABV – many beers are stronger than this these days, and even a pint and a half of Stella Artois is well into danger territory. Most people don’t know what ‘%’ means to begin with, and they’re hardly likely to be able to do the maths necessary to adjust their intake pro rata.
I was involved in an accident a few years ago (not my fault) and had to take the mandatory roadside breath test. I blew 0mg, and the police officer who administered it said:
You’ve restored my faith in driving instructors.
You see, any amount of alcohol in your bloodstream has an effect on your body. Drink ten pints and you’re pissed out of your skull. Drink five and you’re probably loud and showing off. Drink two and you are STILL affected – even if you are still “legal” according to a breath test. I remember when I was at Uni and then when I first started work, and being tired in the afternoon after a couple at lunchtimes – one of the reasons I never drink during the day, even when I’m not working. But just think how it would look if driving instructors were doing their jobs with alcohol in their bloodstream, knowing that these side-effects were likely.
Well done to Michael, who passed first time today with just 3 driver faults. He was very nervous, even though he is a big guy, which just goes to show nerves can hit anyone. It’s just natural to be nervous, though, and he got through it with ease.
The important thing is that having a licence now opens up a lot of new avenues for his work prospects, and THAT is what makes this job really worthwhile. That, and having nice pupils to teach.
This is bit of bad news. I’m due to go and see Status Quo later this year, but that might not now happen as Rick Parfitt has been taken ill and Quo have been forced to cancel several European gigs due to go ahead in August. It must be quite serious, since the band is touring pretty much all year round most of the time, and they don’t cancel lightly.
Rick has had heart bypass surgery in the past, and has also been treated for suspected (but ultimately benign) throat cancer (which I didn’t know about).
No word yet on what the problem is, but apparently we should find out this week. Hopefully, Rick – who is 65 – will be all right whether the tour continues or not. I mean, sod the tour – hope you get well soon, Rick!
Good news! It looks like Rick is OK and will be back on stage during the summer. Apparently it was a furred up valve from his previous bypass operations, which has been rectified by the use of a stent.
Note: I stopped using this after iZettle let me down EXTREMELY badly, almost destroyed my business overnight (and that is no exaggeration at all), and just said “too bad” (that’s not, either). They subsequently apologised and admitted they were wrong, but it was too late. I now use the PayPal card reader option. As of October 2018, I notice this article is popular again, and this may have something to do with an article in Intelligent Instructor, where they only mention iZettle by name when talking about taking card payments. Trust me: iZettle is not the way to go. Go with PayPal – at least until PayPal (which now owns iZettle) assimilates it fully and replaces it’s internal staff with one that works.
I should also now add that I have stopped using PayPal (as of 2023), because instead of assimilating the iZettle reader, the iZettle reader actually assimilated the PayPal one! PayPal effectively turned off all PayPal Here readers overnight in early April. And I refuse to ever deal with iZettle again.
Note: This article was originally written in September 2013 (sub-note: it’s now nearly 5 years as of October 2018). I’ve updated it after using the device for nearly six months now, and following interest from other people. This review is based on my experience at the time, and doesn’t included the extremely damaging experience which caused me to turn to PayPal.
The iZettle website is here – you can sign up instantly and order your reader from there. Believe me when I say that card payments are the way to go for driving instructors. Many are still stuck in the 19th Century – so bypass the 20th Century altogether and move straight to the 21st! If you can’t take card payments then you’re missing a trick, and it’s amazing that people who were umming and ahing about being able to take card payments last year are still at it! Just get one of the damned things and get on with your proper job!
My iZettle finally arrived, and it’s a nice solid piece of kit. It sits easily in the palm of your hand, as the picture here shows, and yet it weighs in at about 120g and doesn’t feel like it is going to blow away in a draught or anything.
Cards with a chip (requiring a pin) go into a slot at the bottom, and there is a swipe slot at the top for non-chipped cards (which are becoming a rarity in the UK).
I set up my account with iZettle at the time I ordered the reader, so it was verified and ready to go when I opened the box. Likewise, I had downloaded the iZettle app for my smartphone and all that remained was to link the two together.
Pairing them is done by enabling Bluetooth on your phone (mine’s always on anyway), and holding the green tick button on the reader for a few seconds. You’re then prompted to enter the last three digits of the reader’s serial number, and that’s it. It connects immediately and announces that you’re ready to insert or swipe a card.
I used it for the first time a few hours later, taking a payment of £180 for a block booking from a pupil. Basically, the pupil put their card in the machine, I keyed in the amount on my smartphone and clicked “charge”, the pupil then entered her PIN, and within 15 seconds the transaction was complete. There was the opportunity to email her a receipt, but she didn’t want that. Absolutely painless, and no visit to the bank required. I love it!
Having used the iZettle for several days now (as of September 2013) I can truly say it is a godsend – ordinarily I’d have made at least one and possibly two trips to the bank for the combined amount of money I’ve taken over several days (or I’d walk around with cash and cheques in my pocket until I got time to go in). If I was going to pick a fault, it would be that I now haven’t got any cash in my pocket!
As of the end of April 2014, I’ve taken payments exceeding £10,000 since September last year. Obviously, this is turnover I’m talking about – not profit – but it has prevented me having to go to the bank much at all, and certainly I’ve not taken a single cheque since I got the iZettle (if people can write cheques, they will almost certainly have a debit card, and if they don’t then you won’t want to be taking cheques from them in the first place).
EVERYONE who once wrote cheques (and some who used to pay in cash) is now using this to pay me. Money goes straight into my account a couple of days after the pupils pay, like clockwork. Some pupils still prefer to pay in cash, of course – some even alternate between card and cash depending on the state of their bank balances – but it has worked out brilliantly. And being on 4G now has made reliability of the phone signal that much greater, at least in my area.
I can use Paypal to take payments, so why do I need this?
Look, no one is saying you can’t use Paypal. Sometimes, that is a perfectly sensible method. The problem is that you can’t easily get people to do it in the car – and if you do, it is long-winded and time-consuming. It isn’t possible if you can’t get a reliable internet connection. Even getting people to do it from home often involves chasing them up because they “forgot”.
There are a lot of things in life you don’t actually need to survive – you can use an abacus to work out your accounts, but a calculator or a computer is far better; you can stick with your old 26″ glass tube TV and still watch movies, but a 40″+ flat screen TV is better; you can make do with just the terrestrial channels, but if you have cable or satellite you get a lot more choice. 21st Century people will always choose the latter option in all these examples.
It’s the same with this. By all means, carry on taking cash and cheques, and making time-consuming trips to the bank. Try and coerce people into transferring money to you via Paypal or direct bank transfer. But the 21st Century ADI will be wanting to make life a lot simpler for himself and his clients by being able to take direct payments in the car.
For the record, over the last month (April) about 70% of my pupils have paid by card, 29% in cash, and 1% by direct bank transfer (because his new debit card PIN hadn’t arrived from the bank).
How much does it all cost?
You buy the card reader outright. It costs £59.00 at the time of writing. Then, there is a 2.75% charge levied on each transaction, so if you sell something for £1.00, you pay 2.75p. If you sell something for £100 you pay £2.75. And so on. The transaction fee is on a sliding scale, and if you take more than £2,000 I any month then the rate goes down – to as low as 1.5% if you take £15,000 or more. iZettle calls it the Smart Rate, and any savings are credited back to you periodically.
Every time you make a transaction, iZettle deducts the percentage fee and then credits the balance to your bank account. It takes about 24 hours for iZettle to process it, then about 1-2 days for it to appear in your account. However, on weekends, iZettle credits it on the Monday. Yes, it would be nice if there was no transaction fee, and the money went into your account immediately, but in the business world things usually don’t work like that.
What does it look like when you use it?
Well, you can see the reader, above. There is an app that you install on your phone, and through it – and your online account area, which you can also access via a PC – you can set up a product catalogue, or take ad hoc payments by just typing in the amount on your phone, and then letting the customer type their PIN into the reader. The system logs the location where payment was taken, and you can send a receipt via email (though you can get receipt printers if your business is in a fixed location). The system keeps a full log so you can monitor your sales, and you can download the data in spreadsheet-friendly formats. You can also issue refunds through the app. It’s all very easy to use.
How long does it take for payments to clear?
Assuming you’re using chip & pin (in the UK, there’s no reason not to be) if you take a payment on a Monday, iZettle pays it to your nominated bank on Tuesday, and it appears in your account within three working days. Mine usually takes one or two working days. If you take a payment on a Friday or over the weekend, iZettle pays it to your account on Monday. If Monday is a bank holiday then the payment may delay until Tuesday.
If these small delays are a problem for you then you perhaps ought to stick with cash.
Do you need an internet connection to use it?
Yes. If you can’t get a mobile phone signal it won’t take payments. Quite honestly, though, that’s not an issue unless you live in an area where you are effectively cut off. I’ve found that even when the signal drops, moving a few metres can often restore it.
How do you get logs?
Or, how to extract data for your accounts. You log into your iZettle account and go to Sales. There, you can either select individual days, or months, and view the receipts for that period. Then you point at Export in the top left and download either a PDF file or an XLS worksheet with the data inside.
Alternatively, you can go into Transactions, choose your time period, then export the data in a single file.
Does iZettle make payments on Bank Holidays?
iZettle is not a UK company. When I used it, apart from the several days delay being paid in the first place, they didn’t pay at weekends or Bank/public Holidays in THEIR country (Sweden). I should point out that PayPal pays same day on ANY day – even on Christmas Day, if your bank allows it – and payment occurs almost instantly. PayPal says to allow “up to two hours”, but mine goes in usually before I can log out of PayPal and into my account.