Birmingham (And Yorkshire) Learner Test Fail Rates

The Birmingham Mail has apparently done one of those FOI requests and discovered that some Birmingham learners have failed their test 21 times. It reports:

  • 23 failed 21 times or more
  • 105 took 16-20 attempts
  • 863 took 11-15 attempts

It also quotes similar figures for the theory test:

  • 70 had taken the test more than 20 times
  • 165 took it 15-19 times
  • 780 took it 10-14 times

It also says – without explaining the significance of the detail – that the figures cover the period 2004 to 2013. Almost a decade! So hardly the end-of-the-world scenario being implied. Furthermore, The Birmingham Mail makes the familiar mistake of behaving as if the world begins and ends with its readership. If it had done even a small amount of research it would have found this almost identical article in the Spenborough Guardian (in Yorkshire, if anyone was wondering).

The Spenborough story seems ecstatic over the fact that:

  • ¼ of the worst drivers in the country were tested at Heckmondwike
  • five women made 158 attempts between them at that test centre
  • one learner took 34 attempts
  • 2 women each took 32 attempts
  • two more took 30 attempts

Again, these data cover almost a decade, and the Spenborough Guardian also refers to the fact that Bradford saw two people take 30 1nd 31 tests, and Leeds saw someone take 32 attempts. And it also points out that as far as the theory test is concerned, two men in Leeds took 55 and 56 attempts to pass (apparently, someone in Southwark, London took 110 tries). So it might come as a bit of a surprise to the Birmingham Mail to learn that their fame only extends a few miles after all.

Both stories draw on the “expertise” of third parties to add comment. In the Birmingham story, they quote Nigel Humphries of The Alliance of British Drivers (ABD). He says:

It would be slightly worrying to be on the road with someone who has failed their driving test 20 times and only passed on the 21st.

Of course tests can be a lottery and people can get unlucky a number of times. But it is also true that some people are definitely not suited to driving but keep on taking their test.

Well, if it were that simple then I’d agree. But no mention is made of the ethnic diversity in Birmingham, a city which is traditionally seen as having a high immigrant population. As I’ve pointed out in several previous articles, non-UK drivers tend to have a desire to go to test before they are ready. As unpalatable as this may be to some people, it is just a fact of life – and one I have witnessed myself many times.

However, once you get into the realms of whether or not people are suited to driving you’re on very dangerous ground. To begin with, who is going to tell them? I don’t mean who wants to – there are plenty of very seedy people who would fit that bill. I mean who has the right or the expertise to condemn them outright? After all, on what basis do you draw an absolute conclusion about someone’s mental abilities over something that is likely to affect the entire course of their life? And you surely wouldn’t do it based solely on their country of origin? If you did, where would it stop? The last guy who tried it died in a German bunker in 1945.

Over the years I have had quite a number of pupils who privately I had hoped would just give up. A couple did – with me, at least – but others were determined to pass, and pass they did. The “worst” one I ever had who kept at it (160 hours of lessons, and the most mechanical driver you could ever wish to meet as the result of an accident when he was younger) passed on only his third attempt. I’d tried unsuccessfully to persuade him to switch to an automatic somewhere in the middle of his lessons, and I despaired of ever getting him through his test. But I was totally wrong, and I know he’s happily driving around just like any other normal person. On the other hand, I’ve had superb drivers who have had as many as nine attempts at the test before passing. One recent one I’ve mentioned previously was eventually diagnosed with adult ADHD, and he passed first time with me, though he’d failed a handful of times before I took him on. Then there was a girl several years ago who was so badly affected by nerves on test days that she was physically sick – we actually had to stop on one pre-test warm-up for her to go and be sick, and other times she was sick before she came out. She passed on her 4th attempt with me, but had previously failed five times. And then there was a Polish lad who was a great driver, but who found something different to fail on each test until he passed on something like his 7th attempt. None of those were any less deserving of their licences.

I’ve only had two who were so bad I was surprised they could even walk, let alone expect to be able to drive, and I suspect that both of them went with other instructors after they stopped lessons with me (no doubt with a bucket full of stories about how it was all my fault).

But back to the topic here, the Spenborough article quotes a local instructor.who I have to say inadvertently shows another area where the problems might be coming from. He rightly points out that the places in question have high populations of people whose first language isn’t English. But he then goes on to blame the routes and independent driving – apparently, following signs or directions is hard for non-English speakers. He finishes by saying:

It is a difficult test centre but it’s not impossible. If you do everything right on the day you should pass.

You can’t help but get the impression that he believes passing is down to chance. However, returning to the main point of the articles, the most obvious fact which everyone seems to be missing is that if people are genuinely ready for their tests then most will pass within a handful of tries. Those who are genuinely not suited to driving are in a very small minority.

Playing With A Loaded Gun Not Dangerous. No, Really.

This story has cropped up on a few feeds, and it is highly misleading (that’s even before the Daily Mail has offered its own interpretation).

Baby with a gun - honest, it's not dangerousIt would appear that “dumbing down” is reaching even places like the London School Of Economics (LSE) and Carnegie Mellon University, the inmates of which establishments now appear incapable of identifying suitably robust data as the source of alleged scientific studies. They can’t even refrain from trying to give witty titles to their papers.

Basically, they have concluded that using a mobile phone while driving doesn’t increase your chances of crashing.

The “study” is flawed beyond belief. To begin with, it harvested data from phone masts for conversations which jumped between cells (i.e. were assumed to be made by people on the move in cars). The calls monitored were made only after 9pm, and so were skewed towards those users using special free tariffs (yes, it is American data only) offered by many carriers. The calls only involved voice – no internet traffic was monitored. And there was no way of knowing how many of the calls were made using hands free devices.

A child's paintingThis has all the hallmarks of first year students cutting their teeth in learning how to publicise their “research”, no matter how amateurish the actual data. It’s just like when kids paint a picture with daubs of of colour and people pretend it is good – sometimes straying beyond normal parental encouragement and foisting the artwork on the wider public.

There are plenty of studies – proper ones, and anecdotal “survey” types – which say exactly the opposite, and a proper scientist would be very cautious in drawing extreme conclusions from results like those generated in the current story. This is especially true where the results fly in the face of everything that is obvious.

Driving and farting about at the same time with things in the car (such as phones, satnavs, and babies) is absolutely guaranteed to increase the risk of something going wrong. After all, you can drive around for years in a car with defective brakes or tyres and not have an accident – but that doesn’t mean defective brakes and tyres don’t increase the risk of an accident.

The report – both the original “research” and the press interpretation – is highly irresponsible. It shows what happens when you dumb down education and allow people to think they’re something they’re not. In this case, people like Saurabh Bhargava (Carnegie) and Vikram Pathania (LSE), who apparently consider themselves to be scientific researchers.

Nottingham Council Clods Create Further Road Congestion

I mentioned a few weeks ago how the City Council had started work on the Ring Road while work on the tram extension was massively behind schedule. And this was alongsideA Council Roads Dept Employee numerous other incompetently managed schemes involving road closures and traffic restrictions.

Only today, on a lesson with a pupil, we drove the length of the Ring Road. Apart from the road works at the Aspley Lane roundabout, there was massive congestion around the Basford junction. Traffic is being diverted for some reason, and so is being forced on to the Ring Road (I believe it is because they have shut the railway crossing at Vernon Road – which of course is a consequence of them also having closed Nottingham Station for over a month and diverting all rail traffic to the Parkway Station along the A453, which we all know is restricted due to the on-going widening works). Once we left the northern end of the Ring Road and made our way towards Mansfield, we were again stuck in traffic because road works (this time, the signs attribute this to the Bumpkins of County Hall) have commenced near to the roundabout at the junction with the A614. Temporary lights are up, and work is scheduled to last FOUR WEEKS.

That last paragraph mentions – directly or indirectly – around a dozen separate locations where the imbeciles at both Nottingham City and County Councils have instigated road works all at the same time.

And to cap it off, they just sent out another hugely expensive brochure detailing the on-going tram works. In particular, you’d better brace yourself for the worse congestion yet, because from 1 September 2013 they will be closing Wilford Lane for “approximately 4 months”.

Yes, you read that right. Apparently, the extended Christmas those living on Ruddington Lane have experienced while that road has been closed for almost a year, when it was only due to be for “approximately 3 months”, is due to end. And the problem will now be shifted to an even worse location, most probably for an even less reliably scheduled period of time.

As I’ve said many times before, they are complete and utter prats.

Yet More Pro-Cyclist Rubbish

As the number of cyclists being hit by cars continues to rise, the government still demonstrates it’s inability to get with the plot. This story tells how £94m is being pumped into promoting cycling around British cities.

Laughably, the story says:

The money is to improve existing and fund new cycle routes.

Yeah, right. And just to clarify that for people who might not know – a “cycle route” is something that no “serious” cyclist would ever go near, preferring instead to use the roads (or pedestrian crossings and pavements if the lights are on red). Of course, the term “cycle route” could also mean just painting some lines on existing roads, which would get around that problem completely and also allow councils to brag about how many million miles of “cycle routes” they have installed.

Although the current death toll is down to the fact that bicycles and cars don’t mix, and the monkey-see, monkey-do effects of two years’ worth of Tour de France victories and the Olympics, Labour is making itself look foolish by missing the point by as wide a margin as the bunch of clowns who run this country:

Labour said roads had become less safe for cyclists under this government.

As I say, the rising toll is down to the rising number of cyclists – most of whom only have one helix in their DNA – tottering around on the roads. The only effect the government’s cash injection will have is to make matters worse. Cameron says:

Following our success in the Olympics, the Paralympics and the Tour de France, British cycling is riding high – now we want to see cycling soar.

This government wants to make it easier and safer for people who already cycle as well as encouraging far more people to take it up and business, local government, developers, road users and the transport sector all have a role to play in helping to achieve this.

I think people need to be prepared for this for the next 50 years. We’re going to be milking the bloody Olympics for all we can get, and using it to justify idiotic schemes like this.

Cyclists should be encouraged to use velodromes and closed cycle routes. Those who insist on using the roads should be licensed, and subject to the same penalties as motorists for breaching Highway Code rules – one of which needs to be that they MUST use official cycle routes when one is located less than 10 metres away from them. And 99% of them need proper training before being granted any such licence.

The money being made available should be spent on all that – not in encouraging more of the prats to go on to the roads.There’s enough trouble with just motor vehicles without adding more and more poorly trained and not-very-bright cyclists to the equation.

Test Pass: 6/8/2013

TickWell done Matthew, who passed first time today with just two driver faults. Much of the credit must go to his dad, who trained him initially, and he came to me to round things off.

An interesting bit of information out of this was that his insurance has gone up by about £450 just by moving from “learner” to “passed” status – and that’s with a policy which involves a black box.

I always warn my learners who pass to inform their insurer before they drive their car – if they don’t, they probably wouldn’t be covered if they were pulled over for any reason. Everyone else should bear that in mind – your insurance may well rise, but that’s the only option unless you want to drive illegally! When you look at it on a monthly basis, £450 is less than £40, so it isn’t that bad. And it beats getting points, possibly a ban, and a subsequent huge insurance increase as a result of that.

In Matthew’s case, the black box policy premium will probably come down again in three months times once he starts accruing good driving data.

Quality Private Practice Counts

This thought has occurred to me on and off for quite a while now. I often mention it to pupils when they say they’ve been out driving with their mum or dad, or whoever. But one pupil in particular has hammered it into my brain recently.

Her husband is called… well, let’s call him Ray. She drives me mad (in a harmless way) – especially at the start of lessons – when almost every sentence will start with “Ray said…”

Not long after she’d started with me, she got in the car one lesson and immediately said:

Ray said you shouldn’t park next to a lamp post.

I’d parked near one (it was level with the back door) so I could open the passenger door. I explained that this was nonsense and the only thing you had to make sure of is that passengers could open the doors if necessary. But that set the stage for all lessons since.

I should point out that Ray is – or was, until recently – a taxi driver.

A few weeks ago, we were driving away from her house. The speed limit goes from 30mph, up to 40mph, then up to 60mph over about half a mile or so. Even before we’d driven off and gone round the first roundabout, I’d had at least four “Ray said…” answers to my advice and questions.

The next thing I know, we’re accelerating rapidly in the 30mph zone with the 40mph several hundred metres away – we’re over 35mph when this conversation took place:

Me: Hey, hey, hey! What’s the speed limit here?

She: Ray said it’s OK to speed up

Me: [I hadn’t yet realised she was accelerating for the 40mph zone] The speed limit is 30mph, so slow down!

She: But Ray said it’s OK to get ready for the 40mph speed limit.

Me: [using the duals controls to slow us down] What? The speed limit is 30mph here…

She: But Ray said…

Me: That’s it! Take the next left and pull over [we pull over]

Me: What do you mean “Ray said it’s all right”? The speed limit is 30mph and you were aiming for 40. The 40mph sign is miles away. What do you think would happen if a speed camera saw you doing 40mph in a 30mph zone? Would you get a fine?

She: Well… but Ray said…

Me: Look. I’ve had enough of what Ray said. Who are you paying to teach you to drive? Me or him? He’s a taxi driver, and they’re not especially renowned for their driving abilities.

As an aside, that reminds me of another conversation with this pupil via text (I’d asked her to book her test for early August):

She: Can I book my test for July [date]?

Me: Well, it’s a bit earlier than we said. Do YOU think you’ll be ready?

She: You’re the driving instructor, that’s why I’m asking YOU.

Me: OK, book it – but this is on the strict understanding that if you’re not ready then we will move it. Are we agreed on that?

She: Yes. But Ray said he will help.

Me: How? Is he going away?

She thought that was really funny (and we DID have to move the test). But back to the first conversation, later in the lesson – and I can’t remember what prompted it – we had this exchange:

Me: Has Ray got any points on his licence?

She: [pauses] Well, he will have.

Me: What for? [I then had a thought] Hey, they’re not for speeding are they?

She: I wasn’t going to mention it. But yes – but it’s not like what happened back there.

Me: I’ll bet.

She: No, it wasn’t…

I won’t go into full details, but it still demonstrated a lack of road skill on Ray’s part – and he’d obviously told her to break the speed limit, so he must have been prepared to do it himself.

Then there was the Nuthall Roundabout Situation (cue: soundtrack from Pulp Fiction). A few weeks ago we were heading towards this along Woodhouse Way (A6002), and I’d prompted her through it for the A611.

Earlier this week, again approaching the roundabout from the same direction, the conversation went like this:

Me: We’re coming up to the Nuthall roundabout. Now, we’re going straight ahead down the A610 this time – not the A611 like last time. Can you remember how to do it [she apparently does this a lot with Ray, and has “no problems”]

She: Erm… well…

Me: [we’re closing in] Look for A610 on the road. You need to keep to the right, remember… Can you remember how to do it? [She heads straight for the left hand lane marked ‘M1’]

Me: OK. So that would be a “no” then… [I twitch the car over to the right hand lane]… now, look at where it says A610… [we stop at the lights]… Plan ahead. Look for where it says “A610” on the road lanes… [we move off and head straight for the A611 lane, which means cutting other traffic up. I grab the wheel and get us back in the correct lane]

She: Oh, I normally go that way with Ray. I didn’t know you meant this way.

Me: That’s why I said we weren’t going down the A611 like last time, and why I repeatedly said A610 and to look for “A610” on the road.

And just for the icing on the cake, right at the start of the lesson I had asked her to go straight ahead, 2nd exit at a small roundabout. The lanes are clearly marked with white arrows. She makes straight for the right-turn only one. Her justification for this?

That’s the lane I normally use with Ray when I go to see people up here.

This time, I pulled her over and just explained that Ray obviously wasn’t picking up her faults.

So, as usual I have come to my point in a very roundabout (no pun intended) way. And it is this:

  • Whenever you do private practice, make sure it isn’t just to “go to the shops” or for mum or dad to have a drink so that they don’t have to drive (which is just as illegal as drinking and driving, anyway).
  • Go out for practice, and only practice.
  • Practice the things you aren’t good at, not the things you are.
  • If it becomes apparent mum or dad (or whoever takes you out) is missing faults, get them to sit in with you on a lesson and let your instructor point out what they should be looking for.

Common missed faults include:

  • MSM
  • mirrors on overtaking or slowing down
  • not looking properly at junctions and roundabouts (emerging)
  • steering
  • braking (too late/too harsh)
  • roundabouts
  • lanes
  • speed and speed limits

This is by no means all of them. They are often missed because mum or dad (or whoever) isn’t as good a driver as they might like to think.

Being taught the wrong things – or being allowed to do the wrong things without being picked up for them – leads to bad habits, and bad habits are far harder to break than they are to form.

They also lead to failed driving tests.

Seatbelt Law

A reader wrote asking about the Law relating to the wearing of seatbelts by rear seat passengers. You can read the full legislation here.

The Motor Vehicles (Wearing of Seat Belts) Regulations 1993 says that seatbelts MUST be worn IF FITTED. This applies to both front and rear passengers.

Part II of the legislation says:

Requirement for adults to wear adult belts

5.—(1) Subject to the following provisions of these Regulations, every person—

(a)driving a motor vehicle (other than a two-wheeled motor cycle with or without a sidecar);

(b)riding in a front seat of a motor vehicle (other than a two-wheeled motor cycle with or without a sidecar); or

(c)riding in a rear seat of a motor car or a passenger car which is not a motor car;

shall wear an adult belt.

(2) Paragraph (1) does not apply to a person under the age of 14 years.

There are exemptions. Under these, the legislation says:

Exemptions…

(3) The requirements of regulation 5 do not apply to—

(a)a person driving a vehicle if the driver’s seat is not provided with an adult belt;

(b)a person riding in the front of a vehicle if no adult belt is available for him in the front of the vehicle;

(c)a person riding in the rear of a vehicle if no adult belt is available for him in the rear of the vehicle.

So in most modern cars, all occupants are required to wear seatbelts, and there is no distinction between front or rear passengers.

Incredibly Stupid Learner Banned

In Chelmsford, a learner driver on a motorbike did a wheelie in a snow storm, overtook a car, and then crashed. He suffered what are described as “life changing injuries”.

George Harding, 18, admitted driving dangerously, driving without insurance, driving without an MoT, and driving outside the conditions of his licence. He was not displaying L plates, even though he only had a provisional licence. You’ll note in the story that the bike was a 510cc model – considerably outside the maximum engine size allowed for provisional holders.

Incredibly, his lawyer said:

It was a moment of madness. It was out of character, a moment of utter stupidity.

As a result he has paid a very high price in terms of his injuries suffered and his family.

Well, if he knew how to do a wheelie in the first place it was hardly as “out of character” as this comedian suggests. Likewise the fact that he had such a large bike and was not displaying L plates – it was absolutely and completely premeditated behaviour. The only word we can all agree on in that first sentence is “stupid”.

And as for the second sentence regarding his “suffering”, arrange the following three words into an appropriate sentence: right, him, serves.

He was banned for 12 months, ordered to take an extended test, and fined £525.

Road Rage. Again!

This report from Scotland tells how police are seeking (link now dead) a driver who punched another in the face and walked away after narrowly avoiding a collision.

The report doesn’t say anything about who was to blame for the near miss, but if the guilty party was the man who ended up being punched… well, sometimes people do such stupid things on the roads you can see why things like this happen. It doesn’t make it right, but you can understand it.

Unfortunately (and that’s a joke before “angry woman from Manchester” chimes in again), doing what many people simply dream of being able to do when confronted by idiots is against the Law.

Remember: if someone cuts you up, or nearly causes you to have a fatal accident while you’ve got your kids in the car, you are wrong if you in any way show resentment towards the other driver.

Low-life Boy Racer Threatens To Do It Again

The picture below shows an example of pond scum. The one on the right is some stinking green stuff that grows on stagnant water.

Shiad Mahmoon and some Pond Scum - spot the differenceThis report tells how Shiad Mahmoon, who is 24 and unemployed, was spotted driving a hired Audi R8 Spyder (worth more than £100,000) at speeds estimated to be in excess of 165mph. This was measured from a helicopter – police believe Mahmoon could have been going much faster.

He was found guilty, banned for 3 years, ordered to take an extended test, and fined a paltry £515.

He said in court:

I’m still going to drive- catch me if you can.

He defended himself, and in what must be the worst attempt at mitigation in the history of the world he tried to claim that he couldn’t remember the incident because of “a brain injury”. I’d certainly have to agree that there is something wrong with his brain, but I’d put the problem much further back in his pathetic little lifetime. Somewhere around the point of conception.

Shiad Mahmoon clearly has a few chromosomes missing. Police will undoubtedly catch him again.