Diary Of An ADI

Someone sent me a link to this advert on YouTube. Trunk Monkey is an advertising gimmick for an American car dealer network. A bit like our Carling ads with that squirrel. It’s very clever.

There is actually a series of these ads, but this one is easily the funniest (and most appropriate to this site). It’s a shame there isn’t a real product like it.

EDIT: As well as the Bradford Rat , one has turned up in County Durham as of April 2012.

The Sun can never leave a new story alone. Only a day after the Giant Rat from Bradford, we now have one in Lincoln .

In order to keep the story alive, The Sun skirts neatly around the issue over whether or not it is a giant NATIVE rat or some foreign or escaped species. It carefully includes a link to another – and totally unrelated – story which would allow lesser minds to conclude that the EU is trying to cause Britain to be overrun with these “Giant Rats”.

Let’s face it: unless this is actually a huge native rat, it is virtually a non-story. So The Sun has to keep it on the boil.

Not to be outdone, the Daily Mail is now on the case with its own take on the Lincoln animal. Its headline trumpets: “‘Beast of Bradford’ giant rats found in Lincoln factory… How many monsters are out there?” They’ll be calling in Nick Pope next.

Both newspapers are falling over themselves to interview “shocked, horrified, and terrified” locals – typically old ladies and single mothers of six. Oh, and the bloke who suggests that they might attack a child! They’re even digging up comedians from as far afield as Essex to claim they’ve seen them down there.

It makes you wonder what they’ll report next.

The best piece of information comes from some guy in Leeds:

…Leeds businessman Steve Luya, 55, who lived in Nigeria for years, insisted our picture showed an African Greater Cane Rat that had escaped after being imported.

I’m still confused, though. You see, if I ever saw a rat the size of a small car I’d kick up quite a stink. That’s because it isn’t normal. So I cannot understand why it’s taken until now for these people to reveal that they see them almost daily.

EDIT: There are updates to this story in Giant Rats: II and Giant Rats: III & IV.

This story has had a lot of radio coverage today. It’s also been covered by Sky.

Apparently, someone in Bradford (I guess it just had to be up Yorkshire way – remember the Beast of Buckshaw from that Lancashire village ) shot a giant rat. According to the story, it was 2½ feet (that’s ¾ metre) long – and judging by the picture, that doesn’t include the tail!

The Sun really does love to confuse things, though. Well, to scaremonger.

Experts have suggested that it could be a Coypu – a South American rodent (not “rat”), but which is sometimes called a “giant rat”, or perhaps some other non-native animal which has escaped captivity. The Sun has latched on to the “giant rat” label, and already has “super rats from South America” as a variant. Don’t their researchers ever look things up properly?

And the locals were quick to leap on the bandwagon.

The residents of Ravenscliffe estate in Bradford, West Yorks, are used to seeing massive rodents that sometimes appear in their kitchens and lounges…

…Brandon toted an air rifle as he went “ratting” with pals on the edge of the estate – which they had heard was rife with rodents…

…”I’ve seen thousands of rats during the course of my work and go shooting a couple of times a week. But I’ve never seen any as big as this. The one I shot was absolutely terrifying. I was shaking. Goodness knows where the others went. I’m glad I don’t live there.”

After taking the photo, the ratters dumped the shot rodent in undergrowth. It is thought it was eaten by a fox.

The estate has long had a monster rat problem. Rebecca told how her cat Marie cornered one in her lounge. But it stood and fought as it was just as big as the moggy…

Neighbour Julie Briggs, 28, told how she and partner Andrew Denton, 24, hear rats fighting and squealing in the walls of their rented semi, which stands opposite open countryside.

Mum-of-six Julie said: “I find droppings on the cooker when they get into the house. I’ve seen them in the lounge as we watch TV.

It’s strange that having found something so extraordinary (i.e. a rat the size of a small car) that they needed to photograph it, the “ratters” then dumped the corpse in the undergrowth. Strange. Or convenient.

And I hope Brandon and his mates are Authorised Persons. Even shooting vermin requires that the person doing the shooting must be so.